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Travelling Shovel Of Death

Some say it thirsts for blood; others say it is an innocent implement forced to do the bidding of murderous fiends. A disturbingly recurrent murder weapon, the Travelling Shovel Of Death appears in multiple different mediums (Usually novels), wherin it is featured murdering an innocent victim.
Henry knew his street well, but he didn't like it. The parameters stretched; the shadows hid secrets; the wind, ever restless, tossed the cloaks of strangers who glared from street corners. But he was sure in his safety. He knew the number of steps to his doorway. He knew where to lift his feet a little higher to avoid tripping on sidewalk cracks hidden in the dark. He knew who to avoid - at least he thought he did, in his naiveté.

A cat was waiting on his doorstep, that night. Dark, soft fur, long legs and a thrumming purr, yellow eyes glinting with reflections of far-off streetlights.

It smiled, sharp, glistening teeth ever white against the shadow of its fur.

In 42 years, Henry had never once seen a cat smile. Perhaps a trick of the light, or an illusion, he thought. Or maybe not. He knelt, looking the cat in the eyes.

It smiled at him, wider.

Wider.

A shadow moved; soft leather brushed against carpet, and a coat loosened its folds. "You're drunk again," said the voice. "Do you know, Henry, how much I dislike drunks?"

The cat hadn't moved; Henry glanced to the side, and caught a glance of soft brown shoes.

"Mr Woon," he slurred. "Ian. Mate. I just..."

He stopped.

Mr Woon smiled at him; a slow, langorious smile, not unlike that of his cat.

Then slowly, deliberately, he rested the shovel's tip on Henry's neck.

"I dislike drunks very much, Henry," he whispered.

Then he put his foot on the travelling shovel of death, and pushed down.
by WillohWisp September 22, 2011
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poor man's shower

much like the mexican shower, it is a quickened alternative to a shower or a bath. requires the dipping of one's head underneath the faucet so as to clean the hair but not the entire body.

the term originates from a detroit urban legend whereby one man had only enough money to generate water for his hair. he was, in fact, poor.
1. time is money, just take a poor man's shower
2. look, we're running late. either take a mexican shower or a poor man's shower.

3. if you think you're gonna be able to go bravo delta tonight, you gotta at least take a poor man's shower
4. you can tell he only took a poor man's shower this morning
by BIGGG AL May 28, 2009
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Hot Girl Shower

A long shower a girl takes in order to prepare for a date or big event. She exfoliates, washes her hair, does a face mask, uses her nicest body wash, and shaves. The goal is to emerge soft, glowing, and sexy.
I’m meeting this guy from Tinder for a boat party in 3 hours, time to take a hot girl shower.

I’m gonna take a hot girl shower and then I’ll be right over.

Hot girl summer starts with a hot girl shower.
by Lndslvns August 7, 2021
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Philosophy shower

When one spends an abnormally long time in the shower because they are putting thought into some of the deeper issues in their life.
Friend: Dude you were in the shower for 45 minutes! What the hell were you doing, jacking off?

Guy: Nah dude I was taking a philosophy shower.

Friend: Oh ok that's excused then.
by FuctButSects October 22, 2010
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Pre Shower Shit

Shit you take before a shower, pre-shower ritual. Also the best time to take a shit. (P.S.S)
"Hey bro I'm gonna go take a shower"
"Don't forget to take your Pre Shower Shit"
by Dicked September 30, 2012
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shower-plop

When someone chooses to void their bowels of fecal matter while taking a shower, usually the result of laziness. The defecator must then leave the feces in the tub for someone else to deal with in order for it to be a proper shower-plop.
Chris was running late for work and did a shower-plop to save time.
by Barnaby J. Buttsnap III September 4, 2008
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Navy Shower

Navy man - Hey Tate bud g, hop in the navy shower with me
Tate - ok bud g coming now
(tate drops soap, Navy man bum fucks him hard and rough causing Tates ass to rupture giving him haemorroids)
by benj.1_ November 16, 2021
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