plonker

A polite, in mixed company, and alternative word for stupid cunt and wanker.

John is a plonker.

by Dick Splash August 17, 2003

plonker

Someone whose words are not worth reading.
See also plonk.

"Sheesh, what a plonker, I just forwarded all mail from him to the bit bucket.

by Alexis_J_M September 17, 2005

plonkers

Nursery word for poos, after the 'plonk' they make when they hit the water.

Oh look, you forgot to flush the toilet and it's full of plonkers!

by David from Kingsbury January 20, 2006

plonker

What you call someone who is so drunk that his head hits the table and makes a loud "Plonk!"

Ingrid is such a plonker! She is smashed out of her mind!

by Boberto the Great December 3, 2007

Plonker

To be so drunk you're unable to remember the meaning of certain words.

Gerry: You were fairly hammered last night.
Keith: I was off me bleedin plonker I was!!!!!!! Yeeoooww!!!!

by gerbear85 May 28, 2008

plooker

1. one that, or he who, plookes.
2. a long narrow object, that for various reasons, is inserted into something else.
3. the person that inserts the object.

Did you see the plooker on that bull by the roadside? I'm glad I'm not a cow!

by pyroclastic flow February 5, 2009

Plonker

Plonker:
Person of Little Or No Knowledge and Electrical Retarded

Ever got an Electrical shock because of sheer stupidty,therefore you are a PLONKER

by Moodygeezer May 27, 2009