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diamond deception

the illusion, manifesting a few days after becoming engaged, that women you know other than your fiancée have become vastly more attractive than they were before your engagement, causing you to temporarily question your decision to propose.

Origin: The engagement is sealed with a diamond ring, and your female friends aren't actually any more attractive than they used to be; hence, the "diamond deception."
Guy 1: Hey, congratulations on your engagement last week!
Guy 2: Thanks, bro.
Guy 1: How does it feel?
Guy 2: Well, honestly, these last few days I've been noticing how hot all my female friends are. But now that I'm engaged to be married, I'll never be with any other naked woman again!
Guy 1: Oh man... you're totally suffering from the diamond deception!
by newfiance July 1, 2010
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Lunch Detention

When you do something bad that doesn't warrant a detention. Instead, you have to face the wall of the cafeteria and starve while everyone else is eating. In my opinion, it's only going to make you want to get into more trouble.
Lunch detentions are the stupidest shit ever invented.
by Sheks Broken Condom April 14, 2017
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detention

When you did nothing wrong but the demons (techers) still torture you
Teacher: You got detention
ME: Why?
Teacher: IDK, just for fun
by smertieboi February 22, 2019
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Owl neck detection device

Basically, an owl neck detection device is a device needed to determine where an owl's neck is. It is used when babysitting an owl, when it comes to tucking the owl into its bed. It is needed after you have put the pyjamas on the owl and made it lose its mind (owls are nocturnal- I'm wearing pyjamas but I've got to go out!).

An owl is essentially a one piece unit, its just a head and a body. Therefore a neck detection device is very handy on determining where the blanket needs to be pulled up to.
The neck detection device is essentially just a stick with a pointy thing on it, you put it next to the owl and it points to the neck and you pull the blanket up to that point and remove the device and tip the owl back. Sorted.
"Never put a blanket over an owl. Unless of course you're babysitting an owl and it wants tucking in. In which case, its fine."
"Can you tuck me in please?"
"But I'm never supposed to put a blanket over an owl."
"I'm ever so chilly. Can you tuck me in please, I'm ver-ver chilly"
"Alright just this once but its breaking all the rules.

"Is that it?"
"Its still not high enough"
"What about that?"
"It doesnt even cover my owl boobs!"
"Well how about that?"
"What are you doing?! You trying to kill me you mad bastard? You nearly suffocated me!"
"I don't know where your neck is do I!"
"Well you could have asked! Or at least use an owl neck detection device!"
by Tatie Shploud April 12, 2009
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Deception Tab Shift

When you deceive your parents that you doing homework by shifting tabs. You put google on one tab and you put the actual website you looking at on another.
Deception Tab Shift

Alex is on facebook
Mom comes in
Alex shifts to google
Mom smiles and leaves room
Alex goes back to facebook
by Almanianc3D May 3, 2010
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Systemtic Deception

Jimmy falsely believed the earth was a globe because of Systemtic Deception
Marys systemic deception prevented her from believing in our creator.

The act of making a people believe something that's false through various systems like schools, churches, pseudo science, cosmology, evolution and other forms of indoctrination in order too control a false narrative.
'Jimmy' falsely believed the earth was a globe because of Systemtic Deception
by Scotovna November 12, 2020
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Deception

The act of deceiving another. An action used for personal gain by lying to someone. If you tell are lie, and they believe you, you are deceiving them; deception.
The art of successfully using deception is a skill worth mastering if you know how to use it.
by kyle.biddle January 23, 2011
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