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close the register

a pleading to someone to cease using sarcasm or dry humor. Principly used when the third party fails to understand the joking nature. Originated in episode 3F07 ("Marge Be Not Proud") of The Simpsons, when Jeff Albertson (AKA Comic Book Guy) says to Bart "Seeing as we are unfamiliar with sarcasm, I shall close the register at this point..."
first guy: "...and the other gynocologist says "Fund us? We're lucky she doesn't sue us!"
second guy: "Uhhh, ok."
first guy: "Gynocolgist? Fund us? Fundus?"
second guy: "I don't get it."
third guy: "Oh, Jesus, Pete! Just close the register!"
by Awful Show Keyz September 28, 2006
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close the register

a pleading to someone to cease using sarcasm or dry humor. Principly used when the third party fails to understand the joking nature. Originated in episode 3F07 ("Marge Be Not Proud") of The Simpsons, when Jeff Albertson (AKA Comic Book Guy) says to Bart "Seeing as we are unfamiliar with sarcasm, I shall close the register at this point..."
first guy: "...and the other gynocologist says "Fund us? We're lucky she doesn't sue us!"
second guy: "Uhhh, ok."
first guy: "Gynocolgist? Fund us? Fundus?"
second guy: "I don't get it."
third guy: "Oh, Jesus, Pete! Just close the register!"
by Awful Show Keyz September 21, 2008
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the register

when you stick your cock in and out of a girl real fast giving her the bug eye effect
yeah i rung her up like a register her eyes almost popped out
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change register

by uttam maharjan October 31, 2010
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cash register

to hit someone with a register of cash
if you dont shut up, im going to have to cash register you
by ninja November 22, 2003
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cash register

refers to a crackhead looking kid who would go by the name of Lawrence
by dfgvbyrthbf June 12, 2011
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Gash register

The act of putting coins on your girlfriend's tits, then fucking her until they fly off; flipping her over straight after and swiping a credit card through her arse crack.
Yeah I won't be seeing Jane again, I think I freaked her out with the gash register last night.
by Zonal K September 2, 2019
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