by Mr. handfart January 10, 2011
A combination of zombie apocalypse and neck beard. It it well known that neckbeards are obsessed with the collapse of society, so they fantasize about some kind of apocalypse. The thing is that most neck beards are either extremely over or underweight there for extremely unathlectic, so in the extremely unlikely events of an apocalypse they will most likely be the ones to die first for obvious reason. I’ll give them credit that they usually know a lot about survival, but that’s about it. There are three main reasons why they have this mindset.
1) They don’t have the social skills to fit into normal society
2) There are no marriage laws so they can force a fair maiden to court them and be some kind of white knight
3) They think their gonna be Rick Grimes from the Walking Dead or maybe even a Daryl, but in reality they’re most likely a Eugene
4) They think they will somehow out live all the athletes and chads
In the end why the hell would anyone want anything a horrible as some kind of apocalypse to happen. I mean seeing all your loved ones get eaten and die that’s just plain awful.
1) They don’t have the social skills to fit into normal society
2) There are no marriage laws so they can force a fair maiden to court them and be some kind of white knight
3) They think their gonna be Rick Grimes from the Walking Dead or maybe even a Daryl, but in reality they’re most likely a Eugene
4) They think they will somehow out live all the athletes and chads
In the end why the hell would anyone want anything a horrible as some kind of apocalypse to happen. I mean seeing all your loved ones get eaten and die that’s just plain awful.
Yes people like this actually exist
Zombie-beard: I’m so ready for the apocalypse I have all my katanas and machine guns!
“Chad”: How will you outrun them? You’re 300lbs?
Zombie-beard: I won’t run like a coward I’ll kill them all! You ignorant simpleton!
“Chad”: Whatever man.
*zombie outbreak*
“Chad”: Oh shit! Run!
Zombie-beard: *gets eaten* AHHHHH! NO! THIS IS NOT HOW IT TURNS OUT IN MY THE WALKING DEAD FAN-FICTIONS MAGGIE WAS SUPPOSED TO LEAVE GLENN FOR A REAL GENTLEMAN LIKE MEEE!!1!
Maggie: Who is that guy?
Glenn: No idea
Zombie-beard: I’m so ready for the apocalypse I have all my katanas and machine guns!
“Chad”: How will you outrun them? You’re 300lbs?
Zombie-beard: I won’t run like a coward I’ll kill them all! You ignorant simpleton!
“Chad”: Whatever man.
*zombie outbreak*
“Chad”: Oh shit! Run!
Zombie-beard: *gets eaten* AHHHHH! NO! THIS IS NOT HOW IT TURNS OUT IN MY THE WALKING DEAD FAN-FICTIONS MAGGIE WAS SUPPOSED TO LEAVE GLENN FOR A REAL GENTLEMAN LIKE MEEE!!1!
Maggie: Who is that guy?
Glenn: No idea
by Thequeenofbasicbitchery October 28, 2017
Sally, please don't rub the stubble on my face if you haven't washed your hands after going #2, because you've now given me a fecal beard and I have to disinfect my face.
by jennacola March 08, 2013
The pubic hair of a redhead female full bush in the shape of a triangle. Resembles a goatee of witch would be expected to be seen on Satan's chin.
by Jack369 June 29, 2014
The result of copulation between a man and a cursed corpse. The man's penis takes on the appearance of a hairy jalapeno.
Origin: The condition was first mentioned on the podcast "Learning to Curse with Adam & Chuck", where it is used as a recurring joke.
Origin: The condition was first mentioned on the podcast "Learning to Curse with Adam & Chuck", where it is used as a recurring joke.
Person 1 Hey, bro... how do you cure a bearded pepper?
Person 2 There is no cure... that's what you get for being a necrophiliac.
Person 2 There is no cure... that's what you get for being a necrophiliac.
by Learningtocurse August 28, 2018
When a heterosexual woman divorces her gay husband.
After 30 years of unknowingly acting as Bruce's beard, Cindy finally divorced him after he got caught red-handed at the gay bar.
Bruce: I'm sorry I didn't tell you that I was gay when we got married. Will you stay married to me and pretend that we have sex?
Cindy: I think it's time you came out of the closet - I'm shaving the beard!
Bruce: I'm sorry I didn't tell you that I was gay when we got married. Will you stay married to me and pretend that we have sex?
Cindy: I think it's time you came out of the closet - I'm shaving the beard!
by Steve Fraser September 21, 2011
Noun
A woman who has straight pubic hair, thereby resembling a goat's beard.
Synonyms: pubes, pubic hair.
#pubes #mons pubis #vulva #yoni
A woman who has straight pubic hair, thereby resembling a goat's beard.
Synonyms: pubes, pubic hair.
#pubes #mons pubis #vulva #yoni
by Aurora Blew March 11, 2017