Gaff

A function/party, smaller than a rager but bigger than a kickback

Friend: Yo are there any gaffs tonight
Me: Nah shits dead on a Wednesday

by theoneandonlyturtleking September 10, 2023

kilo gaffer

a huge line of cocaine

"I always rip a kilo gaffer before I bang a hooker"

by shonuf January 28, 2008

Granny guff

- The smell old ladies leave behind after having a wee in public conveniences.
Caused due to their inability to urinate without releasing small 'poofs'of fart gas.

Little girl eww, what's that smell mum? Has someone had a poo in there?

mum No sweetie, that's just granny guff.

by kingledreamer345 November 21, 2011

Graft Gaff Shag

The typical Scottish lad lifestyle of getting into other girls, where;

1. Graft her on Snapchat, Messenger, etc.
2. Plan or arrange to meet at a Gaff (house party)
3. Shag (have sex) with the girl in a bedroom of the same party (or similar)

It is then customary to follow the Pump and Dump scheme to then repeat the process with a different girl.

"John you planning on getting stuck into Susan tonight?"
"Aye, doing the old Graft Gaff Shag with her"

by Jdiddee May 23, 2016

cum guff

A fart or burp containing a gentleman's semen

Adam had been enjoying an evening of cottaging when he let rip a massive cum guff

by Biggest Boy ever June 20, 2017

Gif-Gaff

A word (or words) that don't make sense or are jumbled in some way.

To tell you the truth, JF made a gif-gaff by saying fazz jestival instead of jazz festival.

by prometheus July 5, 2017

puff guff

Vaginal flatulence; gentle, bubbly, and hilariously extended sound emanating from a (most probably) posh, set of fanny flaps. She retains eye contact throughout. The glorious noise resembles a trumpet nonchalantly bugling underwater through a dense layer of seaweed.

Dude, I headed down south on this poshy washy, and she gave me a face full of puff guff...

by StripedSocks June 8, 2019