Skip to main content

I'm not a player I just crush alot 

(Aka I'm not a playa I just f**k alot) A boy who f**ks alot of girls. he does not want to be tied down because he wants to go after every girl he thinks looks good. In other words, an excuse just so you a guy doesn't have to admit he's a player. Listen to the Big Pun Song!
Q: Are you a player?
A: Naw, I'm not a player I just crush alot

I'm Not A Plastic Bag 

Trendy cotton canvas tote released in 2007 by UK designer Anya Hindmarch. Aimed at reducing the use of plastic bags when shopping. Caused a big hype because it costs only 5 british pounds and is being resold for hundreds on the internet.
The affordability, celebrity endorsement, limited availibity and designer label have created it a much sought after fashion item.

There has been some slight controversy surrounding its "unethical" roots, as it is made in China without using locally grown or organic materials.

The I'm Not A Plastic bag is popular among softcore envionmentalists and fashionistas.
The model Lily Cole strolls the London streets with her I'm Not A Plastic bag

cut a rug like I'm in a carpet store 

When you are getting ready to dance like its nobodies buisness out in the club/bar.
Dude, I cant wait to get to Brew Bakers tonight! Imma cut a rug like I'm in a carpet store!

I'm on a boat 

funny song from snl....was made as a joke to show how any thing can be made into a rap song...or that T-pain repeating what you say will get u rich! either way it became an instand youtube success
Person 1:What's up kendyl!
Person 2:I'm on a boat!
I'm on a boat by Lovebugsman June 2, 2009

I'm Gonna Assrape You With a Chainsaw! 

What you say when there is nothing else to say so whoever you're insulting is just bewildered.
Guy 1: Fuck you Bitch
Guy 2: I know you are but what am I?
Guy 1: A pussy
Guy 2: I'm Gonna Assrape You With A Chainsaw!
Guy 1: What? I am bewildered.

I'm having a midlife crisis 

if this gets published i'll Indiana Jones laso my dick and swing on it
I'm having a midlife crisis please helm me HELP! OH GOD!

****SATIRE*****