Bible

A collection of scriptures written by men such as, but not limited to, Moses, David, Solomon, Daniel, Matthew, Mark, Luke, Peter, James, John, and Paul (formerly Saul). All were inspired by God and are considered holy and good for teaching, reproof, correction, & for training in righteousness. While faith is required, archeology has proven many aspects of Biblical accounts of history to be true, even by secularists who deny any supernatural elements. The Bible teaches that a virgin gave birth to the Son of God, (virgin birth sounds silly but God can do whatever he wants, because he literally controls the universe, so the point is moot). This Person, Jesus, lived sinlessly and was killed for telling the truth about his Godly nature and the hypocrisy of religious leaders of the time. He rose again three days later and his followers spread this message, with some receiving devine inspiration for their writings.

I love reading the Bible, it is so encouraging in these dark times

by Charlie 27 December 24, 2020

bible

An ancient novel full of murder, corruption, homosexuality, bestiality, incest and cruelty. It is often read to children on Sunday.

by The Canadian Information Minister May 12, 2003

bible bullies

Men dressed in suits forcing bibles on the innocent youth. Sometimes they'll come to your front door, sometimes they'll roam around a college campus. Usually mormons

The bible bullies were out in full force today, I could hardly get out the door!

by PANTASAURAUS September 16, 2007

arizona chocolate bible

the act of a man straitening a paper clip and then inserting the newly straitened paper clip into the hole of the penis. It was originally thought by the Incan tribes to be a way to prevent your penis from being possessed by dick devils. This method was proven in 2002 by Dr. Lutz Von Bruno wermenscteidgen to also slow down offortodonperontitis, a naturally ocurring phenomena where in your penis explodes because of too much dairy product consumption

i was mad that ma bitch dumped ma buhlack ass so i gave myself an Arizona chocolate bible

Its a good thing Bill gave himself an Arizona chocolate bible or he would've been possessed by dick devils

Its a good thing Bill gave himself an Arizona chocolate bible or he would've developed offortodonperontitis

by skillet lickers November 3, 2009

bible paper high

In emergency situations of joint rolling, bible paper is used as rolling paper. There are blank pages in the beginning or end, either way they can be zag replacements. Getting bible paper high is after rolling a shitty jay of high mids and bible paper with honey and too much bible paper and somehow igniting it. Smokin this said fatty gets you that bible paper high.

Stoner 1: "Dude no, I got to get home. I don't want to get that bible paper high."

Stoner 2: "Dude get that bible paper high!"

Stoner 2 - blows smoke into Stoner 1's face -

by "yeahh" December 28, 2009

bro bible

a code of conduct for bros to live by to become a more dominant alpha-bro

Stick to the bro bible and you'll be influential to all bros

by BrotimusMaximus July 21, 2014

bible banger

Somone who mentions Jesus more than 300 times in a 10 minuet conversation.

"Hey dude."

"Hey, have you prayed too Jesus lately?"

"Uhm, last night."

"Well you should every 20 minuets, Jesus is our lord and savior."

"Uhh...are you okay?"

"As long as Jesus protects me."

by |x|John|x| September 18, 2005