an overtly feminine dressing/acting lesbian. as opposed to a butch woman. sometimes used to describe a gay man.
all the others girls think Brit's acting femme to fit in with the straight chicks, but apparently that's just her personality.
by dagger_grrl October 12, 2003
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n.) A gender identity in which someone (female, male or other) has an awareness of cultural standards of femininity and actively embodies a feminine appearance, role, or archetype. It is usually--but not always--associated with a gay or queer sexual identity/sexuality. It is usually more accentuated and intentional than a straight female gender identity or gender presentation and often challenges standards of femininity through exaggeration, parody or transgression of gender norms.

n.) A person (male, female or other) who identifies and/or presents a femme gender identity.

v.) To actively embody a femme identity or gender presentation.

adj.) intentionally, cleverly feminine. Feminine in a non-traditional way--or referring to something/one male (or non-female) that/whom is related to or embodies a conscious femininity.
n.) think: that hot girl with long hair who loves dresses but wears combat boots and dates women or men who look like women.

v.) think: drag performances by gay men dressed as women. OR a woman dolling herself up for a hot date--lipstick, heels and all--getting ready to go out with her girlfriend who doesn't really care if she dresses up, but who will be the subject of jealous glances all night because of it.

(colloquialism: femme it up!-- def.) make it more outrageously girly/ a more outrageous parody of culturally prescribed femininity)

adj.) think: that cute gayboy who wears a sparkly Princess tee-shirt that is two sizes too small, but he can rock it anyway. (OMG that shirt is soo femme!) OR that punk chick who may be wearing an outfit entirely from the little boy's section of Marshalls, but who looks more girly in a kid size 10 tee-shirt, ripped jeans and chucks than some women manage to do in their skirts and heels. (she's sure made that one femmed out tee-shirt, it just looks so different than on my nine year old nephew.)
by DySt October 29, 2007
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Before I say anything I would like to say that definitions like this one, can be a very sensitive matter for some people. I am a queer woman myself, and this is what being a femme means to me. I hope that my point can come across well.

Mostly used to describe lesbians, a femme can be any person who identifies as a woman and likes girls. A femme embraces femininity. This could be in the way she presents herself, but it also means being a confident and independent woman. It has more meaning to it than appearances. Loving the color pink isn’t just a “girly” thing. Those stereotypes were made to make women seem soft, and because women don’t want to commit to that idea, they become hateful towards themselves, forcing themselves to reject the idea of being a confident woman, and have internal misogyny. Being femme is being assertive, but not conforming to those ideas. Also spelled fem, the stereotype of typically feminine wlw, are that in sexual relations they are typically submissive, “the bottom”, or “a pillow princess”. This is not true, an when you think about it, it is mysoginistic in the way that people see traditional feminine things as delicate and in a relationship, weak, as bottoms tend to be portrayed as. (being submissive does not mean you are weak, it is merely another harmful idea) Being femme doesn’t mean that you have to date a masculine woman or a butch either, most happy wlw couples do not conform to these ideas nor to the idea of one dominant and one submissive.
“I hooked up with Kassandra the other night, don’t be fooled by her femme looks, she’s a total top.”
by Vintage Violetta November 8, 2020
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Someone who identifies as being feminine or embodies a lot of traditionally feminine characteristics. It's a common misconception that all femmes are passive or submissive, though.
"That guy is so hot. I heard he's a metrosexual."

"Yeah, he's pretty femme after all."


"She's a femme, but don't let the pretty hair and short skirt fool you. She's a total domme."
by shounen March 26, 2004
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a girly lesbian.
lesbian stereotype - butch and femme
Eva's girl is a high maintenace femme.
by pliy April 24, 2003
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She is a femme lesbian. She likes lipstick and she's not interested in men.
by delphichariot June 3, 2018
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a very feminine lesbian who wears make up, thongs, baby tees, mini skirts, fishnet thigh highs, tight jeans, etc. A femme is submissive and will most likely have a stud or butch girlfriend.
Can't nobody tell she's a lesbian because she a femme.
by Philly Girl August 16, 2003
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