uteruses before duderuses

Like chicks before dicks but better.

There's this boy i like, met him at the food court, he has hair like gretsky and he does jumps on his skateboard. Hope he asks me out, except I do not before my best friend likes him aswell and as we know. Uteruses before duderuses

by Nostrils4dayz January 4, 2017

Bros before Hoes

When your talking to a THOT and she ask you to go out but your friends want to hangout

You: Sup THOT
Her: hey you want to go to the movies

You: Sorry bros before hoes
Her mom: YOU WILL NOT TALK TO MY DAUGHTER LIKE THAT

Call ends

by Smart Mexican dude October 24, 2019

Check Thyself Before Thy Wreck Thyself

also known as the 11th commandment, is essentially a rule where you need to think hard about what you're about to say to make sure that you don't say something bad that happens to apply to you too.

to put yourself in a corner by your own statement or action.

ghost 1: man ghosts are such losers

ghost 2: dude, you're a ghost.

ghost 1: bro, you're right

ghost 2: check thyself before thy wreck thyself...

by count philosopher April 1, 2016

Counting chickens before they hatch

When you call something yours before you have it

The hillary voters were counting chickens before they hatch

by 300WinMag March 17, 2017

I suggest you get off my roof before I ignite your frilly, red pants

A proclamation of annoyance and little or no tolerance for the disregard of property, mainly that of roofs.

<Yokel> Hey, Joe-Greg-Billy-John! I can see down yer chimney from up here! Hee-yuck!
<Grampa> I suggest you get off my roof before I ignite your frilly, red pants, Johnny-Smithy-Jeevesy-Beau!

by Bastardized Bottomburp August 8, 2003

bofox

Powerful drug disseminated to viewers of and those interviewed by Fox News. Akin to the nerve-deadening injections (botox) which relax facial muscles to promote a more youthful appearance, bofox is injected into the brain via nerve cells connected to the ears and eyes in order to deaden parts of the brain associated with youthful, liberal thinking. Frequent neurological injections result in the conversion of the viewer into a Republican. Lethal dosages are not common due to the frequent interruption of these sensory injections by stupid commercials.

...When we return, Bill O'Reilly has an interview with Lebanese bankers who claim to have ties to Hillary Clinton.
(CUT TO COMMERCIAL) HEAD ON!! APPLY DIRECTLY TO FOREHEAD!! HEAD ON!! APPLY DIRECTLY TO FOREHEAD!! HEAD ON!! I LOVE YOUR PRODUCT BUT I HATE YOUR COMMERCIALS!! (Return to air)
Continuing our story, Hillary Clinton injects herself with BOFOX and denies claims that she is supporting terrorism by funneling campaign money through a bank in her former home state of Arkansas the supports terrorism and funds Al Quaeda. This smacks of her flip flop on the Iraq war vote. Viewers who don't want to speak out of both sides of their mouths like Hillary need to turn the sound down to diminish the effects of BOFOX and prevent the chance of an overdose.

by Gunner Mench July 8, 2007

Name that thing on the screen before it disappears

A language game played by Brown University students in which an intricately timed powerpoint presentation displays images of clothes, food, etc. while students attempt to name the articles in a foreign language before they pass from one side of the display to the other.

Diego: And what is this.
Joe: der Handschuhe!!!
Diego: ...die Handschuhe?
Joe: Oh...yeah. I love "Name that thing on the screen before it disappears"!

by fivestarfolds March 18, 2011