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martian muff dive

The act of performing oral sex on a female while plastic straws are inserted into the nostrils of the 'performer' to allow for optimal breathing. This reduces the risk of the individual losing consciousness during the act.
"Hey guy, why you gotta nosebleed?"
"Me and the misses were in the middle of a martian muff dive and the straw got jammed in one of her rolls."
by bobbin frapples October 14, 2009
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muffdiver

An alcoholic beverage consisting of a shot glass in a martini glass surrounded by whipped cream. One has to try to drink the shot without using his hands. (AKA Blowjob)
I bought my best friend a muffdiver for her birthday at the club.
by ThatGirl85 September 3, 2005
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muffdiver

these other people got it all fucked up. a muffdiver is someone who goes down on a female, but they choose to do so only while wearing a wetsuit or scuba gear.
"I called the scuba school, but they didnt offer any classes for muffdivers..."
by KevinCA$H August 3, 2006
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muffdiver

ugh.......a muffdiver is a person man or female whome goes down on anothers muff(i.e. pubic bush of hair) and eats out there pussy...usually getting pubs stuck in mouth.....
"OMG,this fucking muffdiver doesn't kno how to give head to save his life!!!"
by Joseph Gomez April 17, 2006
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muff dive

when you make you'r way through a girls pubic hair filled with chunks of duck butter looking for the vaginal opening
for fuck sakes jill...learn how to shave i hate having to muff dive my way through
by spazzy jazzy January 18, 2003
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muffdiving

The act of eating out rob taylor's butthole.
I was muffdiving last night and found a can of diet sprite.
by Roberta s June 22, 2010
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muffdiver

an idiot that comes up with more slang filth than we need, as we all have to much to remember now, without adding more trash to our language.
Like, Duh, I am a Freaking Idiot. I made up a trashy new word. Lets see if all my trashy little friends like it.

Like yeah, I have the mentality of Beavis and Butthead, when I tell my friends that I was with a muffdiver over the weekend.
by StupidPeopleHater January 2, 2008
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