Management Porn

Graphs, diagrams and meaningless reports produced solely for the gratification of management.

Manager: I don't understand?
Techy: Oh. I should have generated some Management Porn.

by SomePoorTechy October 10, 2008

mushroom management

To keep your employees in the dark, and every now and then throw shit on them.

by farks_me September 18, 2003

Management jizz blanket

a term used to describe the type of woman who sleeps with one or multiple members of the management team at her place of work. This is sometimes seen as behaviour common of those wanting a payrise or promotion, but this is not always seen to occur. It is often preceded by consumption of large amounts of alcohol and/or face stroking.

oh like some kind of management jizz blanket?

by Wisevalve November 6, 2010

bureau of land management

The original BLM

Did you know the Bureau of Land Management was established in 1946? And it’s responsible for administering federal lands.

by TheCheeseState November 26, 2021

citigroup asset management

Part of a corporate terrorist operation. Citigroup is known for screwing their employees out of money on their paychecks, especially final paychecks. These sick bastards enjoy not only screwing over customers, but their own employees.

Why is my paycheck short? Oh, because I work for the terrorists at citigroup asset management.

by greengirl123 November 17, 2006

Management

A medical condition - and the professional field opened upon contraction - which nullifies or in severe cases reverses the normal causative effects of gaining skill in an area as experience with that area also grows, as well as inverting the pay-to-productivity ratio.

Bob got management and within 6 months had forgotten everything he had learned in his 10 years as a developer. He can't write a line of code anymore, but now he makes twice as much as he did before!

by Adayin December 23, 2009

Roomba Management

Roomba Management is the management technique of blindly trying out ideas and then randomly changing direction until an idea works, a lot like the Roomba vacuum cleaner. However a Roomba is very effective.

Observing a Roomba in action it basically blindly drives around a room bumping into things and then changing direction until it eventually covers the entire floor. While entertaining to watch, and pretty effective for vacuuming a room, Roomba Management is very painful to experience.

by KingKongDave May 17, 2010