disasterbation

The uncontrollable and critical urge to stimulate one's own genitals for sexual pleasure, often after an extended period of celibacy (e.g. long road trips spent in shared quarters with family members)

Alan: Hey, man, wanna go grab a few drinks at the pub tonight?

Brian: Sorry, I just got back from taking care of my grandmother for three weeks, and she has no Internet at her place... It's time for some SERIOUS disasterbation!

Alan: No problem, dude. See ya next week!

by SansFapFlap April 19, 2011

Disasterbate

Masturbating so hard you cum everywhere leading into a giant disaster situation

guy #1: damn i jerked it so hard i came on everything last night

guy #2: thats what we call a Disasterbate

by Disasterbate October 30, 2014

Disasterbate

Masturbating in the middle of a natural or man-made disaster.

I was a real fighter committing to a disasterbate session through the category 5 hurricane.
As the nazi's invaded my city of Warsaw, Poland and killed my family, I couldn't help but disasterbate

by Pedophile93 November 09, 2011

Disasterbate

When you go home alone and go jerk off after an unsuccessful night of hunting sloots. Tears may be used as lubricant.

Guy #1: Did you hook up with Jackie last night?
Guy #2: No, she was into Dylan, so I just went home and disasterbated.

by Squan14 September 01, 2014

disasterbate

To imagine/dream of disasters

I sat disasterbating over a near by volcano

by John Greve June 22, 2005

Disasterbance

When a person or situation moves beyond being mildly disturbing but it is not a full blown disaster.

Geez, Todd, This is the best part in the movie and you keep talking through the entire thing. You’re creating a real disasterbance. Don’t be an ass!

by Tarklee May 13, 2022

disasterbation

When a colossal disaster strikes, and you use it as an excuse to flex on social media.

It's so sad how the Cathedral of Notre Dame is burning down; here's a photo of me in Paris last month

Stop with the disasterbation.

by GreaterBaiter April 16, 2019