rigor mortis

when someone's dead for a while and their limbs stiffen (not the penis, though if the corpse is laid face down, the flow of blood to the penis can result in an erection.. a treat for necrophiliacs)

when johnny tried to make the dead man give him a hand job, ted said "you idiot! the guy won't move! it's rigor mortis!", so then johnny killed ted and had ted finish the job before rigor mortis set in

by I TURN CORPSES UPSIDE DOWN May 30, 2006

mater mortis

Mother of Death - In the film Insidious: Chapter 2 (2013), during a seance scene, the question "What does she want?" is asked. Fifteen dice (with letters on each side) are then rolled out on to a table. The dice spring to life and spell out "mater mortis" - Latin for "mother of death."

mater mortis mother death insidious ghost evil seance

by DanielSam September 15, 2013

Cooner Mortis

A dead racoon on the side of the highway in various states of rigor.

My god did you see all the cooner mortis on the road today?

by Sammysooser October 25, 2010

Beyond Mortis

A beer drinking metal band.

Did you see Beyond Mortis last night? Yeah I got wasted at their show and got laid by some fine assed big titted slut.

Check out that band. Yeah they are Beyond Mortis, my ear pussies got fucking railed by their music.

Would you like any water sir, fuck no that shit is for toilets, cant you see we are Beyond Mortis.

by Nitrousbob August 23, 2011

rigor mortis

Something that is very stiff and hard to move.

It seems Stewie wee wee, has been stricken with rigor mortis.

by Tyrone November 10, 2004

buffer mortis

The hideous state one reaches while watching an inprogress DVR recording which catches up to real time viewing, thereby having to suffer through commercials.

"Oh man, we've reached buffer mortis. Let's go make a snack."

by LPathe November 30, 2010

nigger mortis

When your friend is couch-locked after a blunt and can't leave.

"Carter's not goin' home. He got Nigger Mortis."

by Freshen Up June 8, 2022