When you go to a coffee shop expecting to see a cute barista ready to make you some coffee, but instead you find a dried up sea hag pushing three on the hoof where the single origin must have been imported somewhere around her.
Ghon went to his local coffee shop expecting there to be a cute blonde spinner to make his morning coffee, but when he got there he was pleased to see the baristapotomus bloated ready for his order. Ghon though about asking for a walrus belch to go along with his Latte.
by SkulletBuster October 19, 2017
Get the Baristapotomus mug.an opportunity for baristas to come together and pull shots, learn more, and essentially nerd out for one or more days. Those that drive ridiculous distances to attend these as possible are considered to be 'jam whores'
"Dude, are you going to the barista jam next weekend? I heard there's gonna be a latte art throw down!"
"No...it's like 7 hours away! I'm not a jam whore like you."
"No...it's like 7 hours away! I'm not a jam whore like you."
by squidgeroo March 27, 2009
Get the Barista Jam mug.Related Words
A barista who knows how to cup both your balls and your mocha. Generally are found at Starbucks or Seattle's Best, but the best and hottest are found in Italy. Baristatutes also can handle warm liquids in or around their face.
by Pety April 23, 2008
Get the Baristatute mug.A poorly paid individual who politely endures the torture of rude posh customers every day they are at work. They are usually extremely interesting and intelligent people, yet are submitted to constant patronisation and unnecessary abuse by the individuals they serve.
Identifying a Barista:
They often show fabulous abilities in memory...
Customer: "can I have a large extra hot soya 2 shot latte, 3 small cappuccinos, a medium wet chai latte, and a tea with 2 tea bags...to take away?"
Barista: "No problem"
They are identifiable by their muscular arms built by carrying enormous trays of dishes and coffee beans across their store...
"Look at those arms on her!"
"Yeah, definitely a Barista"
When a Barista approaches, you will smell them before you see them, and can hence never be tired in their presence..
"Do you mind going on the sofa tonight? You smell of coffee so much that I can't sleep!"
They are faster than ninjas with their hands on that coffee machine...
Barista: "Your coffee is ready madam"
Customer: "Woah already? I hadn't even reached for my purse yet!"
They are polite, despite being continually tested by rude people...
Silly individual: "I want a filter coffee with no milk please"
Barista: "Sure, here you go - enjoy!"
Silly individual: "I WANTED MILK WITH IT, WHY ARE YOU SO STUPID?"
Barista: "Oh, I'm so sorry sir, here's your milk"
A Barista is always hard working, yet underestimated and under appreciated by many.
Identifying a Barista:
They often show fabulous abilities in memory...
Customer: "can I have a large extra hot soya 2 shot latte, 3 small cappuccinos, a medium wet chai latte, and a tea with 2 tea bags...to take away?"
Barista: "No problem"
They are identifiable by their muscular arms built by carrying enormous trays of dishes and coffee beans across their store...
"Look at those arms on her!"
"Yeah, definitely a Barista"
When a Barista approaches, you will smell them before you see them, and can hence never be tired in their presence..
"Do you mind going on the sofa tonight? You smell of coffee so much that I can't sleep!"
They are faster than ninjas with their hands on that coffee machine...
Barista: "Your coffee is ready madam"
Customer: "Woah already? I hadn't even reached for my purse yet!"
They are polite, despite being continually tested by rude people...
Silly individual: "I want a filter coffee with no milk please"
Barista: "Sure, here you go - enjoy!"
Silly individual: "I WANTED MILK WITH IT, WHY ARE YOU SO STUPID?"
Barista: "Oh, I'm so sorry sir, here's your milk"
A Barista is always hard working, yet underestimated and under appreciated by many.
by Truthfulgirl July 8, 2014
Get the Barista mug.by D-Ren July 28, 2008
Get the barista mug.A female (the male term would be baristo) who holds up the line at a fast food soda fountain because she fills her drink then leaves it in the way so she can get a lid, sugar, straw, etc. instead of moving the drink out of the way.
She doesn't care that she's in the way and holding up the line. In fact, she may feel so important that she is entitled to do this!
It's the same kind of conceit that one finds in people talking on cell phones while driving too slowly and not paying attention to others.
She doesn't care that she's in the way and holding up the line. In fact, she may feel so important that she is entitled to do this!
It's the same kind of conceit that one finds in people talking on cell phones while driving too slowly and not paying attention to others.
by Golden-Rod February 19, 2008
Get the soda barista mug.A Barista (coffee maker) expressing attitude. Typically found in 'third wave' coffee venues - Baristatude can mirror arrogance, intellectual elitism and various other cultural prejudices, ultimately expressed as less 'customer service' and more a side order of distain and contempt.
I asked the barista what an Aeropress was, and he scoffed and explained it to me like i was a 4 year old. God damn that guy has serious baristatude
by The Gentleman Observer December 26, 2014
Get the Baristatude mug.