Cottini test

A skill test used solely as an excuse to fire an employee.

Natalia took the Cottini Test and was fired out after that.

by Vipero September 25, 2020

Lad Test

A test(link) to see if a lad(link) is truly your lad.

"Lend me a couple of quid for a pint?"
"I hope he passes my lad test and likes my pic"
"I haven't heard from my mate in a week, must have failed that lad test"
"Sorry, I gotta stay in tonight. I'm going to check out Jimmy's social media to study for tomorrow's lad test"
"Sorry, I'm not giving it my all today lads. Had a lad appointment last night
"what's wrong with Jimmy?" "He just finished the lad test"
"got my 23&Me test back... turns out I'm not the lad"
"Can you feed my dog over the weekend? I'll be out of town to do lad test"
"hey r u comin to my stag and do tmrw lad/?"

by LadOfCoding October 22, 2020

knockup test

Pregnancy test

As in "check out the chick buying the knockup test, everybody.
Wonder what must be going through her head? Yeah, well, since you asked, a family of mayonnaise-guzzling giants is trying to suck me into their suburban nightmare, and there's a solid chance that I have an Eriksen the size of a 15-pound turkey growing inside of me!

by Shisui November 3, 2015

Roofie Test

A test that you t hought you did well on, but it secretly fucked you without your knowledge

Man, I thought I aced that test, but turns out it was a roofie test all along.

by Puay November 9, 2017

Note-In Tests

When one takes a bubble in test (preferably a scantron) and can only think about how hard that song would be on guitar hero.

"Blimey this would be a
hard song on expert" John

"Yeah bitch I couldn't due it on hard" Rick

"Stop cheating rick" Teacher

"Sorry mam his Note-In tests is a beast come take a gander"

a
b
a
d
c
e
a
e
d
c
a d
b e
c
c
"Good crimany you are right"

by Udstanence January 8, 2009

club test

A test that determines if one's future significant other (e.g., future boyfriend/girlfriend) is a keeper. This is usually done on a date by bringing the subject (e.g., future significant other) to a club where he/she is supposedly to get hit on by other suitors.

If the subject welcomes & accepts advances by other suitors and completely ignores his/her date, the subject is said to have failed the test. This test happens in both straight and gay communities; though, it's more prevalent in the latter.

=======
Friend: So how did the club test go for your future boyfriend, Trevor?

You: He failed badly. We went to this club last Friday night, and a hot blonde started talking to us. Trevor very much welcomed the newcomer's presence to the point that he asked me to watch their drinks for a minute.

Friend: Damn, what a douche.

You: Yep. The club test surely revealed that he's a very low-quality BF material. Ain't nobody got time for that.

by amazingjay April 23, 2013

The lift test

The act of attempting to lift a member of the opposite sex to check for sexual compatibility ie "If you can't lift it, you can't shift it".

Put my back out last night attempting the lift test

by El burno July 31, 2009