handy jay and silent bob

1) To perform fellatio on a man silently while stroking his shaft. 2) To give a hand job while sucking the head of a penis without making any sound.

Hey man. I was at this party last night and Sara gave me a handy jay and silent bob in the bathroom.

by Network Pathogen August 25, 2015

Couldn't get a handy in a whorehouse

Someone with very poor closing skills, or a person who is incapable of performing even simple tasks. This term originates in Colorado for someone who goes to a brothel and is unable to negotiate even a simple sex act, such as manual stimulation.

How do you expect to sell twenty insurance policies when you couldn't get a handy in a whorehouse?

by RandyO'Reilly October 22, 2010

Moon over My-Handy

Receiving a handjob under the table at a Denny's restaurant. Preferably while ordering the Moon Over My Hammy.

Got drunk, ended up at Denny's and some broad hit me up with a Moon Over My-Handy for $7.99.

by DaCrun October 13, 2010

Handy Dandy Pecan Sandy

A Handjob Given by a woman of 90 years of age or older.

I didnt know my great grandma was still sexually active, until she gave me a handy dandy pecan sandy.

by NEGRO AFRO BUSH July 22, 2014

80/20 Handy-Blow

A blowjob that is mostly just a handjob.

My new girl went down on me but only gave me an 80/20 handy-blow. My old girl was all throat but this chick wouldn't put more than the first couple inches of my dick in her mouth.

by Steve DeCicco September 7, 2023

Sandy Handy

A handjob given from one party to another with a hand coated in sand. Purpose being pain for pleasure.

"Ani do you want a sandy handy?"
- Padme
"I dont like sand, it's coarse, its rough, and irritating, and it gets everywhere."
- Anakin

by MrFatboy343 June 8, 2018

Peppermint Handy

When an elderly person applies generous amounts of bengay to the male genital area, while aggresivly throttling the shaft and fondling the testicals.

*optional*
To make it festive dress up as either an elf and Santa clause combo and paint the shaft like a candy cane and the testicals as jingle bells.

" Dude, my dick is still numb from your grandmas peppermint handy last night!"

by Haswahhhhhhhh September 5, 2016