João De Jesus

João De Jesus is the most amazing person you'll ever meet, when he comes into your life he will be ur highest point and only take you higher. He has a 11 incher and going strong, He's caring and the sweetestperson you'll ever meet, curious about the world and all the cultures and histories and fucken smexxxxy in a hoodie. Has multiple pink florida shorts and even though he acts gay and retared he isn't ( the game part), he loles to work on himslef and fet better and gives back to the community, may or may not be racists, he comforts well and is understanding

He has a beautiful soul and a beautiful at of seeing life and will open u up so many new experiences, he will be the best thing that will ever happen to you.
Jack : " if João De Jesus was gay id hit that"
Bob : " nah he's just a little dyslexic, but he's the best person you'll ever know"
by He's my world March 27, 2024
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João De Jesus

João De Jesus is the most amazing person you'll ever meet, when he comes into your life he will be ur highest point and only take you higher. He has a 11 incher and going strong, He's caring and the sweetestperson you'll ever meet, curious about the world and all the cultures and histories and fucken smexxxxy in a hoodie. Has multiple pink florida shorts and even though he acts gay and retared he isn't ( the game part), he loles to work on himslef and fet better and gives back to the community, may or may not be racists, he comforts well and is understanding

He has a beautiful soul and a beautiful at of seeing life and will open u up so many new experiences, he will be the best thing that will ever happen to you.
Jack : " if João De Jesus was gay id hit that"
Bob : " nah he's just a little dyslexic, but he's the best person you'll ever know"
by He's my world March 27, 2024
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Bread Jesus

A man born from Glutensgard that gives bread to the peasents. He is very powerful, and is a CFT Legend. He is the founder of Yeastianity. h t t p s : / / w w w . y o u t u b e . c o m / w a t c h ? v = 3 n u l w J n T A M Q.
Peasent: "Yooooooooo, it's Bread Jesus! Thank you Bread Jesus from the generous gift of the bread."
Bread Jesus: "np"
by GANDU by Bad Lee Rix January 02, 2023
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This is one of the stupidest songs I’ve ever heard in my life. Like seriously who. the fuck cares. 1991 sucked ass. The 90s were really degrading. Apart from some of the music but it was a pretty horrible decade.
Whoever wrote “Jesus Jones - Right Here Right Now” should be shot
by WorseThanHitler November 18, 2020
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Jesus Christ Lizard

Also known as a Chinese Water Dragon, a lizard that’s well-known for its ability to run on water.
Holy sh*t! Did you see that Jesus Christ Lizard running on water?!
by GsxrBarbie April 23, 2018
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Jesus seats

When you have tickets to a game in the nosebleeds, but they're really far from the court/field high up in the stadium, which is why they're called Jesus seats since you're so high up you can see Jesus.
Guy 1: I got tickets to the game!

Guy 2: Where are they? They better not be Jesus seats.
by It's that dude June 13, 2020
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Jesus Tear

that tear someone(preferably a chick) gets when she’s sucking your dick and goes to deep....
(on chick to another) i went down on him so deep i gag’d n got a jesus tear
by bootsherk March 22, 2018
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