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absolute bits

being in a state of foolishness, dissoray or confusion for a limited time period.
Today I was in absolute bits because I thought the orange I was eating was an apple.
by playcrossy December 22, 2010
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absolute knickers lah

when something is simply shambolic/rubbish. the 'lah' is to be emphasised heavily.

Simply calling something 'knickers' does not suffice...
This division 3 football match is absolute knickers lah

Was out at a nightclub last night, had to go on the beer cos it was absolute knickers lah

That essay of mine took me ages, its absolute knickers lah
by mon errigal February 25, 2011
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Absolutely Wasted

A term used for somebody who is quite intoxicated, typically with beverages such as Greene King IPA. Used by Alexander Robertson in the group UK Simpsons II, when asking for Simpsons episodes. Although roasted for his post originally, he then became internet famous thanks to the group and in other social media after featuring in a BuzzFeed post.
Eric: Man, we're quite drunk, aren't we?
Nick: Nah mate, we've been on the IPA lad. That means that we're in fact absolutely wasted!
by LionelHutz February 17, 2017
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Absolutely stunnin

Something that makes your eyes pop and your jaw drop out of amazement.
It was a view so sublime and (absolutely stunnin) I thought I had died and gone to heaven!
by Sillysox July 12, 2017
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Absolute Zeros

Besides the scientic connatations of this word there is also Aetheric & Esoteric meanings of this.
1. Everything usually has a point of origin which begins from 0 dimension its Aether (smoke/shadow) which must connect several different points 2 b whole in 3rd dimension. If they r whole they r classified as +or- (good or bad). However, if 1 has been somehow disconnected from themselves by way of hypnosis or trauma, they actually have no boundaries unlike the masters who slaved them. They r keepers of blue flame. & as soon as they realize who they r can b capable of miraculous & terrible things! Bcuz they r shadows of themselves & exisist soley of the light, they r formitable weapons against all SET authorities.

2. Those who r underestimated due 2 their indifference & percieved weaknesses by all who encounter them. They r those who hide in the shadows broken, the unnamed, monarchs, berzerkers, wintersoldiers & any1 being secretly controlled by some1 else. They r actually stronger than their masters who hold them captive! A they need 2 do is acquire the key 2 the kingdom... FORGIVENESS! End game.
Ive seen many absolute zeros who had powers they had no ability 2 wield without forgiveness.

Absolute zeros will b the vanquishers of the masters bcuz it was written.

Never choose a side
Its ok 2 run away 2 hide
Never burn 2 hot
& never b so cold u forgot
4 the time will come
When mAsters will b judged 4 all they done
& those who nobody even knows
Will arise & b like superheros
Once underestimated outcasts that every1 woes
Will vanquish evil from inside cuz they r absolute zeros!
It is finished
by MaKHiAurqueenB September 21, 2017
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Absolute speed

Absolute speed also known as maximum speed is a theory about how anything with mass moves through multiverse spaceat speeds faster than light which constantly increase. Due to lack of friction (because there is no atmosphere), gravity and changes in physics or lack of them this is possible. This theory also tells that everything travels with absolute speed not just light so we can say that everything travels as fast as light (since the speed of light also increases) or faster. Because this speed is constantly increasing we currently can't mesure it since we don't know the entry speed.
That piece of paper travels through the multiverse space at absolute speed.
by Yesverymuch December 18, 2018
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Absolute Beta Male

Someone that all the girls feel comforable talking to because they are undeniably and permenently destined for the friend zone.

See also: Beta Soy Boy
Friend 1:All the girls only want to talk to me
Friend 2:Thats because you're an Absolute Beta Male destined for the Friend Zone.
by YeetyYeeter September 10, 2019
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