A Modern Major General:
I am the very model of a modern Major-General,
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical
From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical;
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical,
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical,
About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news,
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse.
I'm very good at integral and differential calculus;
I know the scientific names of beings animalculous:
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
I know our mythic history, King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's;
I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty taste for paradox,
I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus,
In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolous;
I can tell undoubted Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies,
I know the croaking chorus from the Frogs of Aristophanes!
Then I can hum a fugue of which I've heard the music's din afore,
And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore.
Then I can write a washing bill in Babylonic cuneiform,
And tell you ev'ry detail of Caractacus's uniform:
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
In fact, when I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin",
When I can tell at sight a Mauser rifle from a javelin,
When such affairs as sorties and surprises I'm more wary at,
And when I know precisely what is meant by "commissariat",
When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern gunnery,
When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery--
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy,
You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a gee.
For my military knowledge, though I'm plucky and adventury,
Has only been brought down to the beginning of the century;
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
I am the very model of a modern Major-General,
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical
From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical;
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical,
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical,
About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news,
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse.
I'm very good at integral and differential calculus;
I know the scientific names of beings animalculous:
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
I know our mythic history, King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's;
I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty taste for paradox,
I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogabalus,
In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolous;
I can tell undoubted Raphaels from Gerard Dows and Zoffanies,
I know the croaking chorus from the Frogs of Aristophanes!
Then I can hum a fugue of which I've heard the music's din afore,
And whistle all the airs from that infernal nonsense Pinafore.
Then I can write a washing bill in Babylonic cuneiform,
And tell you ev'ry detail of Caractacus's uniform:
In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
In fact, when I know what is meant by "mamelon" and "ravelin",
When I can tell at sight a Mauser rifle from a javelin,
When such affairs as sorties and surprises I'm more wary at,
And when I know precisely what is meant by "commissariat",
When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern gunnery,
When I know more of tactics than a novice in a nunnery--
In short, when I've a smattering of elemental strategy,
You'll say a better Major-General has never sat a gee.
For my military knowledge, though I'm plucky and adventury,
Has only been brought down to the beginning of the century;
But still, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I am the very model of a modern Major-General.
by A Modern MAjor general October 8, 2008
Get the Modern Major General mug.A chat board found on neopets. These are the things they talk about (in short forms with tonnes of emoticons, of course):
1: musical groups that sing about teen angst
2: bf/gf dumping them
3: How they hate their life
4: What stereotypical group is better
1: musical groups that sing about teen angst
2: bf/gf dumping them
3: How they hate their life
4: What stereotypical group is better
1: OMG OMG!!! :) :) :) LP vs GC!!!!!!
2: My bf dumped me... :) :( :( share my sadness. NOW!@!#@´##ERYU#^%@!~~!~~~~
3: IM 9, pregnant, no bf, i wanna kill myself, whats sex?, come in here and say "be happy!" and i will cheer up.
4: PREPS ARE SOOOOO BETTER THAN PUNKZ!!!!!!!!!! I HATE LABLES!!!!
2: My bf dumped me... :) :( :( share my sadness. NOW!@!#@´##ERYU#^%@!~~!~~~~
3: IM 9, pregnant, no bf, i wanna kill myself, whats sex?, come in here and say "be happy!" and i will cheer up.
4: PREPS ARE SOOOOO BETTER THAN PUNKZ!!!!!!!!!! I HATE LABLES!!!!
by Seenus September 2, 2003
Get the neopets general chat mug.by Carrion October 15, 2003
Get the general mug.A town in Victoria, Australia which is often subjected to prejudice from cretins who shat themselves when they entered Norlane, ran off, and thus formed their half-arsed opinions based on those experiences.
Contrary to somewhat popular belief, the town is not filled with racist right-wing hicks. If it was, then Melbourne would be the Nashville of Australia.
Of course, like every town, it has it's bad eggs. According to the Victoria Police Crime Statistics, Aug 2008, more than half of the municipalities in Victoria half a worse assault rate per 100,000 people per year than Geelong. For example, Geelong's rate is 559 assaults per year per 100,000 people. The Melbourne CBD rate is 2628.7.
Part of the reason that Geelong's "ghetto lifestyle" has been publicized is because of the Geelong Advertizer in association with The Herald Sun, both News Corp. owned, know that fear and social prejudice sell. Unfortunately, some people are still blinded to Murdoch's tricks.
The real problem with Geelong is (to paraphrase The Clash) are the bourgeois cunts (yes, not every in Geelong is working class, not that that's something shameful) who, instead of feeling bad and trying to help the disadvantaged in the town, make fun. That and the tossers who live in Geelong who call the town a shit hole, then vandalize it beyond recognition. The same can be said for many towns, mind you.
All in all, Geelong is a decent town to live in, one that is constantly expanding and welcomes it. However, it could do with a half decent Mayor for once. 11 Mayor's in 10 years, and we're still stuck with image-centric ideals that never work out.
Contrary to somewhat popular belief, the town is not filled with racist right-wing hicks. If it was, then Melbourne would be the Nashville of Australia.
Of course, like every town, it has it's bad eggs. According to the Victoria Police Crime Statistics, Aug 2008, more than half of the municipalities in Victoria half a worse assault rate per 100,000 people per year than Geelong. For example, Geelong's rate is 559 assaults per year per 100,000 people. The Melbourne CBD rate is 2628.7.
Part of the reason that Geelong's "ghetto lifestyle" has been publicized is because of the Geelong Advertizer in association with The Herald Sun, both News Corp. owned, know that fear and social prejudice sell. Unfortunately, some people are still blinded to Murdoch's tricks.
The real problem with Geelong is (to paraphrase The Clash) are the bourgeois cunts (yes, not every in Geelong is working class, not that that's something shameful) who, instead of feeling bad and trying to help the disadvantaged in the town, make fun. That and the tossers who live in Geelong who call the town a shit hole, then vandalize it beyond recognition. The same can be said for many towns, mind you.
All in all, Geelong is a decent town to live in, one that is constantly expanding and welcomes it. However, it could do with a half decent Mayor for once. 11 Mayor's in 10 years, and we're still stuck with image-centric ideals that never work out.
Bellend - lolz, fuck Geelong, it's full of intolerant wankers.
Un-stereotypical, typical Geelong person - Oh the irony!
Un-stereotypical, typical Geelong person - Oh the irony!
by I Hart Joe October 18, 2008
Get the Geelong mug.This is the open court of opinion where the more notoriety or popularity you gain the more judgmental accusations you will have to endure. Gain that notoriety by succeeding financially and you will become the target of "THE INCREDIBLE ACCUSATION INDUSTRY" This opinionated part of society regards themselves as having the military rank of a "GENERAL" and the wisdom of GOD. Their main objective is to attack any private industry with money. Once you enlist and go public you will be instructed who to hate and why you should hate them. This group makes up the majority and they will attack anyone and everyone who wishes to remain private. The accusation will be that you are not doing or paying what the majority perceives as your fair share. This is the opinion even if you are giving everything that you agreed to give. Meeting your obligations will never be enough because responsibility does not mean the same thing to them as it does to you. They will call you irresponsible and deny that it is a not guilty verdict.
The General Public called me irresponsible so I thanked them for setting me free of the blame. I would not wish to face the punishment for being responsible for every accusation they make. The largest occupational block in the USA was Drivers, but now it is unqualified whistleblowers who established the religious cult of the car at the federal level. Try competing with that cult financially without a Licence to drive.
by Spiritual-Master January 6, 2022
Get the General Public mug.A gene that enables a person to perform their best work whilst consuming amounts of alcohol that would kill people without the gene.
Named after British war-time prime minister, who defeated Hitler's Germany whilst intoxicated the majority of the time.
Named after British war-time prime minister, who defeated Hitler's Germany whilst intoxicated the majority of the time.
Jane: what exams results did you get?
Dave: straight A's cuzz.
Jane: how?! you drink vodka when you study and have a bottle of don before the exam?
Dave: must be the churchill gene.
Dave: straight A's cuzz.
Jane: how?! you drink vodka when you study and have a bottle of don before the exam?
Dave: must be the churchill gene.
by churchill90909 June 5, 2011
Get the churchill gene mug.wsogmm, the sum of ways of looking at all the universes. Everything, if it exists, it is part if it. if it doesn't exist, it is part of it.
by annon. February 8, 2004
Get the Whole Sort of General Mish Mash mug.