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Jesus [Yeshua]

Letter from Pilate to Tiberius Caesar

A young man appeared in Galilee preaching with humble unction, a new law in the Name of the GOD that had sent Him. At first I was apprehensive that His design was to stir up the people against the Romans, but my fears were soon dispelled. Jesus of Nazareth spoke rather as a friend of the Romans than of the Jews. One day I observed in the midst of a group of people a young man who was leaning against a tree, calmly addressing the multitude. I was told it was Jesus. This I could easily have suspected so great was the difference between Him and those who were listening to Him. His GOLDEN COLORED HAIR and beard gave to his appearance a celestial aspect. He appeared to be about 30 years of age. Never have I seen a sweeter or more serene countenance. What a contrast between Him and His bearers with their black beards and tawny complexions! Unwilling to interrupt Him by my presence, I continued my walk but signified to my secretary to join the group and listen. Later, my secretary reported that never had he seen in the works of all the philosophers anything that compared to the teachings of Jesus. He told me that Jesus was neither seditious nor rebellious, so we extended to Him our protection. He was at liberty to act, to speak, to assemble and to address the people. This unlimited freedom provoked the Jews -- not the poor but the rich and powerful.

See Washing Library

Your most obedient servant,
Pontius Pilate
Jesus Yeshua was seated at the right hand of GOD his Father in the begining! As was The Holy Spirit and Wisdom. The FEAR of GOD is the first sign of Wisdom!
by THE-INTELLECTUAL July 13, 2024
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Kung Fu Jesus

Kung Fu Jesus- Christmas from someone that doesn't celebrate. Modern form of xmas which was used by Jewish people that would not verbally proclaim Jesus as the Christ.
Happy Kung Fu Jesus to all my Christian friends.
by MillionDollarLester December 25, 2018
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Jesus would be an army

The Fandom of the boy group BTS is called ARMY and some of them made the term "Jesus would be an army". If Jesus would still be alive, he would definitely be an army, because nobody can resist BTS.
Jesus would be an army. PERIODT.
by KIMCHIENTERTAINMENT June 19, 2020
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jesus rider

Someone who is too ‘holy’ for their own good. Also someone who believes Jesus himself is inside them and that anything they do bad they will go directly to Hell for it.
ShiThead is preaching on her instagram posts again”. “Yeah, ShiThead is just a jesus rider.”
by Cracker with Attitude October 28, 2017
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Jesus Christ

(To the developers: this is part one)

1) First I will prove God exists. For the sake of the argument, I will be using science. According to the principle of the conservation of energy, energy remains constant and cannot be destroyed or created. This means that there is effectively zero chance of the universe existing in the first place because, before the Big Bang, there was nothing. In other words, for the universe to be created, someone must have created the energy possible for its creation. Also, that same someone has to be above physical laws, because as per the principle of conservation of energy, energy can't be created. This means that there has to be a God because the universe started from nothing, when no energy existed and the person who made the universe must also be very powerful, considering he is above the laws that transcend the universe. Also, Mendel's law of inheritance completes my point, as it explains why certain characteristics are passed down from generation to generation. Put simply, the ascendant takes after the descendant. Therefore, if we know there is a creator, then that creator must resemble its creation. Science says the universe is infinite, so the creator must also be infinite. The universe entails terrifying powers like black holes, so the creator must also be all-powerful. With the keywords infinite and all-powerful, we have described God.
Jesus Christ is the way, the truth, and the life
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Black Jesus

A cutaway gag from family guy that is way more funnier if you actually watch the clip
“I rode into town on an ass

Yo mama’s ass!”

-Black Jesus
by MUGlol69 October 10, 2021
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Jesus Burrito

1. a theoretical burrito that Jesus Christ makes so hot that even he himself cannot eat it (usually said to be microwaved).
2. any burrito that is so hot that it can't be eaten by a mortal human (although Jesus probably could).
3. A burrito that is so hot it makes you see Jesus.
4. Archaic: A burrito that is so hot that it burns the sin right outta ya.
5. Noun: Another name for the Holy Corpse Parts in Jojo's Bizzare Adventure, Specifically Eyes of Heaven, seeing as they look like burritos in the game
"Oh, we got another Jesus Burrito" - Joel
by Theawsomudkip December 7, 2020
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