veselekov's zeroth law 

A scientific law explicitly stating that all members of the female race shall be unable to be sexually attracted to any man who has full autonomous control of their eyebrows. This does not hold true for any relationship that remains at a platonic level, such as friendships, or even jogging buddies. Predates his first law of gas, grass, or ass: no one rides for free

Player 1: Man, that dude's eyebrows are going everywhere! he's even doing the wave!

Player 2: He probably suffers from veselekov's zeroth law

veselekov's zeroth law by veselekov October 14, 2012

Alin's Law 

The ending point in a conversation where one participant introduces consuming one's own bodily waste.

Alin's Law:

Adam: Hey man what's up? Are you going to that show tonight?
Steve: I don't know, who's playing?
Adam: I don't remember, but he eats his own crap.
Steve:silence
Admam: Hello? ...Steve?

Alin's Law by Crapwellz August 31, 2013

Jake's Law 

The bigger the house, the hotter the girl(s).

We should totally hit that house up tomorrow, don't forget: Jake's Law.

Jake's Law by Jfkwozog September 3, 2013

nick's law 

If you can't take care of your fish, then you shouldn't have a baby

Nick: I had 10 fish, now I have two left
Emily: Well then according to nick's law ,you shouldn't have kids.

nick's law by Apolloslyre44 April 18, 2014

Gremlin's Law 

The chance of something going wrong increases inversely to the time when you need it to get done.

Jim: I need this paper to print now!
James: Well that sucks, cause the printer's jammed.
Jim: I forgot about Gremlin's Law again.

Gremlin's Law by SilverPeppef May 29, 2014

Reverend's Law 

A law enacted by parties on the receiving end of a poorly told story. The law states that, until quality of story is improved, the accused must either start every story with "So I was balls deep in a retarded kid's asshole..." or end it with "...penis" thus making an otherwise worthless story interesting in some degree.

"That story sucks. I'm enacting Reverend's Law."

Reverend's Law by JustDon'tLook June 18, 2014

Boss-in-law 

Your boss' boss.

My boss-in-law called me to get office to see if I would be get inside spy on my boss.

Boss-in-law by Ugly IT Chick August 29, 2014