failure by designer jeans

a song by the band from first to last which is featured on a smartpunk sampler cd. its title is a play on brand new's "failure by design"

"failure by designer jeans"

I'm a mess of insecurities
Attention starved with a narcissistic twist
Don't you think that I'm amazing?
Please tell me I'm worth dating
I have every reason not to leave home today (home today)
Home today (home today)

Mirror, mirror, how amazing is my figure?
Your visitors they fall apart before my pictures
Mirror, how amazing is my figure?
Your visitors they fall apart before my pictures

Please don't believe my words are lacking honesty
I'll be the boy you can't resist
You'll be the tenth girl on my list
I'll write your name upon my chest
These less than three's will never rest
Please don't believe my words are lacking honesty

Mirror, mirror, how amazing is my figure?
Your visitors they fall apart before my pictures
Mirror, how amazing is my figure?
Your visitors they fall apart before my pictures

You'll be the last girl on my list
Action's just a click away
These things photographs could never say
x2

Please don't believe my words are lacking honesty
(You'll be the last girl on my list
Action's just a click away
These things photographs could never say)
x2

by connnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnor May 27, 2006

Density Check

To strike ones penis against anothers forehead resulting in an audible "thump". Often used to test the erection level of the penis.

Just before Luke put his penis in Megans mouth, he performed a density check to test that he had a full erection.

by Lexicon Lenny April 3, 2003

Designated Drover

A designated drover is the responsible person in a group of intoxicated individuals on a night out.

Unlike the 'Designated Driver' they are allowed to be intoxicated, but not to the point that they can not think rationally enough to look after their fellow revelers.

This may include, making sure all of a group get to the next destination, stay off roads, don't eat dodgy hot dogs, kebabs, etc. They may also end up having the responsibility of soothing the individual lying in a pool of their own vomit or tears....

The designated drover can be determined prior to the commencement of an outing or assumed at some point in an unfolding crisis.

"If it wasn't for John the designated drover, I don't know how we would have got home last night."

You were lucky there was a designated drover, otherwise:

you'd have been hit by a car for sure.

you'd have gone home with that crazy_____ for sure.

you would have had vomit in your hair for sure.

by Blankchap November 16, 2011

DW (Designated Walker)

One who makes sure that people who are under the influence walk to their destinations safely

To get back to the hotel safely, Tricia is our DW (designated walker)

by trishfish526 May 16, 2011

Graphic designer

An individual who does precise guesswork based on unreliable data provided by those of questionable knowledge.

You're a graphic designer Harry.

by #Magikarp November 7, 2019

mobile task force unit epsilon 11 designated nine tailed fox has entered the facility, all foundation personnel are to carry out standard evacuation protocols.

an announcement to say that things are about to gat very bad

class d: *runs here and there*
PA: mobile task force unit epsilon 11 designated nine tailed fox has entered the facility, all foundation personnel are to carry out standard evacuation protocols.
class d: crap noooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!

by Adam Goh June 7, 2021

Parsons the new school of design

Parsons is a branch of The New School in Greenwhich Village, Manhatten. Parsons is a member of the Association of Independent Colleges of Art and Design (AICAD), a consortium of thirty-five leading art schools in the United States. It's an art school famously known for it's fashion and located in the Garment District. It has been in Project Runway, and has a very large population of gay students. It has very competitive admissions, and excellent resources. The security and cafeteria staff are hilarious and very fun loving.

"Jenny the lunch lady from Parsons the new school of design just told me spiked her redbulls with vodka before serving us breakfast!"

"Ha. Well clyde just told me his wife was actually a man and is living in guatemala until he can smuggle him/her into NYC."

by floooop October 15, 2007