legal career

The process of working in the legal field, whereby a creative mind is whittled down to create a sophisticated but mindless rule follower that is paid to worry about other people's boring problems that no one would otherwise try to fix if it wasn't for the large amounts of cash that temporarily covers the meaninglessness of the once creative mind's new life.
"Did you hear that Bill graduated law school and is going into a legal career?"

"Yea, that poor guy will be a rich divorced alcoholic misanthrope in 10 years."
by jon_newhart April 30, 2014
Get the legal career mug.

Schrödinger's Legal Age

Schrödinger's Legal Age: When a young woman (18-29) is seen as either a child or an adult depending on the age of her male partner. If she is dating a man her own age, she's an adult. If the man is 30+, she is a child and he is a pedophile despite the woman being of legal age. Does not apply to lesbian relationships.

This practice is usually invoked by 30+ women who used to date older men when they were young, but resent those same men for overlooking them now that they are no longer 18-29.
A woman: Leonardo DiCaprio is a pedophile for dating a 22 year old woman!!!
A Man: Are you suggesting that a 22 year old woman is a child? Sounds like a case of Schrödinger's Legal Age.
by Jolly Jay June 09, 2024
Get the Schrödinger's Legal Age mug.

legal frequentism

A theory of emergent rights which states that as human beings; we are all one person in different bodies.

The legal FOUNDATION of postmodernism..
Legal frequentism argues that our bodies--not minds--are responsible for our sundry behaviors. This indicates that we are legally but not morally liable for our actions since we did not choose our individual bodies.
by flightfacilities February 21, 2022
Get the legal frequentism mug.

Ben Dawson legal

I hope we get away with robbing that bank. Don't worry we'll say it's Ben Dawson legal.
by Ben zo January 13, 2023
Get the Ben Dawson legal mug.

Legaler

When someone is more legal than you
P1 "You do it"
P2 "No, you do it, you're legaler"
by みゆなつき August 13, 2017
Get the Legaler mug.

Legal DiCaprio

When a couple gets together with a significant age gap, especially a middle aged or older man and an 18 to early 20s woman. Named for the joke Leonardo DiCaprio's early 20s girlfriend
Dude, I hooked up with an 18 year old chick last night. It was awesome!
Bro, that's gross, you're like 40
18 is legal though
Yeah, Legal DiCaprio
by Dehydratedninja October 29, 2024
Get the Legal DiCaprio mug.

legal jazz hands

When a plaintiff doesn't have a good case, acts panicky, and freaks out for lack of any other option by filing a frivolous lawsuit, hoping to whoop up public sympathy.
"If they'd had a case, they would've filed for an injunction. Instead, they went all legal jazz hands with a frivolous lawsuit they'll never win."
by Tia Salamanca February 10, 2017
Get the legal jazz hands mug.