The best war ever. Why? Because there were kings and queens, but there were also advanced weapons. Awesome!
There is one case in which World War I shouldn't be considered the best war ever, and that's if you fought in it.
How to fight in World War I:
1. Sit in a stinky trench for a month. Repeatedly get terribly ill from sleeping in mud mixed with shit.
2. Get your ass pounded by hundreds of thousands of artillery shells launched by an invisible enemy. Suffer from shell-shock.
3. Get gassed until you bleed out your ass
4. Jump out of your trench and get shot while mutilating your hands trying to climb over a barbed-wire fence.
5. Get limbs amputated.
6. Go home.
7. Suffer awful Post Traumatic Stress Disorder that makes Schizophrenia look normal.
There is one case in which World War I shouldn't be considered the best war ever, and that's if you fought in it.
How to fight in World War I:
1. Sit in a stinky trench for a month. Repeatedly get terribly ill from sleeping in mud mixed with shit.
2. Get your ass pounded by hundreds of thousands of artillery shells launched by an invisible enemy. Suffer from shell-shock.
3. Get gassed until you bleed out your ass
4. Jump out of your trench and get shot while mutilating your hands trying to climb over a barbed-wire fence.
5. Get limbs amputated.
6. Go home.
7. Suffer awful Post Traumatic Stress Disorder that makes Schizophrenia look normal.
World War I is cool to study, but if I wake up in a World War I bunker tomorrow I will shoot myself in the mouth.
The belligerent stages of World War I (the war had been subtly waiting to happen for decades) began when Archduke Franz Ferdinand (awesome name and title) was assassinated by a terrorist group called the Black Hand (frickin awesome name!) in Sarajevo, Bosnia (badass city even today).
Emperor Franz Josef (yes, "Emperor", it doesn't get better than that) of the Austro-Hungarian Empire then sent an ultimatum to the government of Serbia, which it held responsible for Ferdinand's death. Serbia failed to comply with the demands and was subsequently invaded by the Emperor's troops under General Franz Conrad von Hotzendorf (this stuff is too cool to make up). Soon, Tzar Nicholas of Russia declared that he was mobilizing his massive army. In response, Kaiser Wilhelm II of Germany, who really didn't want war with Russia but previously promised support to Austria Hungary, mobilized his troops, declared war on Russia and France, and invaded Belgium and Luxembourg within days. His plan, the Schlieffen Plan, was to take France out of the war within three weeks, before Russia could mount a major offensive against Germany. He failed in this respect and the western front bogged down to a stalemate 50 miles outside of Paris.
The belligerent stages of World War I (the war had been subtly waiting to happen for decades) began when Archduke Franz Ferdinand (awesome name and title) was assassinated by a terrorist group called the Black Hand (frickin awesome name!) in Sarajevo, Bosnia (badass city even today).
Emperor Franz Josef (yes, "Emperor", it doesn't get better than that) of the Austro-Hungarian Empire then sent an ultimatum to the government of Serbia, which it held responsible for Ferdinand's death. Serbia failed to comply with the demands and was subsequently invaded by the Emperor's troops under General Franz Conrad von Hotzendorf (this stuff is too cool to make up). Soon, Tzar Nicholas of Russia declared that he was mobilizing his massive army. In response, Kaiser Wilhelm II of Germany, who really didn't want war with Russia but previously promised support to Austria Hungary, mobilized his troops, declared war on Russia and France, and invaded Belgium and Luxembourg within days. His plan, the Schlieffen Plan, was to take France out of the war within three weeks, before Russia could mount a major offensive against Germany. He failed in this respect and the western front bogged down to a stalemate 50 miles outside of Paris.
by Randwulf January 31, 2010
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A Warillusen is usually naked in appearance, and lives with his 7 wives, 28 children and 39 aunts and uncles in one small milk-bar home.
Warillusen's are renowned for their quickness in bed.
If you hear a person say 'Ting' instead of 'Thing' then he's probably a Warillusen.
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