Procrasterbating

Masturbating when there are important things to be done, or deadlines to meet.

I didn't finish my report because I was procrasterbating.

by Uh...Fred? November 13, 2011

procrasterbate

v. to masturbate instead of tending to one's responsibilities, where the obvious and more productive and/or beneficial choice, such as finishing one's work or getting much needed rest, is put off for the duration of the "me time" session, and often ignored altogether.

see also procrasterbation, procrasterbator, procrasterbatory

frank: sorry i'm too tired to drive, man. i'm exhausted.
dave: really? didnt you go to your room to pass out at real early last night?
frank: yeah, but i didn't end up going to sleep until about 3 or so.
dave: why?
frank: i dont know, man. i watched "wild things" and it was stupid of me, but i started to procrasterbate for however long it takes form the opening credits to the end of that threesome scene.

or

jenny: what time will you be ready to go to the store to get ingredients for chili night?
kara: probably about five o'clock or so, but call me.
jenny: i swear, if you procrasterbate and aren't ready until a quarter past, you're done for.

by steve m g December 26, 2007

Procrasterbating

Verb
The art of masterbating for excessive amounts of time without ejaculating.;
Edging for a ridiculous long time ;
Jacking off and delaying your climax to the point you lose the ability to;

The cause of "blue balls"

"I have been procrasterbating all day. Now I have blue balls and my nuts are full " fml

by Lauleneke Lukini Brown March 16, 2022

Procrasterbitis

The development of arthritic symptoms from long, extended hours of procrasterbating. Symptoms deriving usually in the wrists, fingers, hands and feet.

Todd had a knot near his third digit on his right hand, with severe arthritic pain after several several hours of procrasterbating. He was diagnosed with Procrasterbitis and told to use his other hand for a week and sent home!

by The Pimp Named Shamrock March 8, 2011

Procrasterbate

To combine the acts of procrastinating and masterbating.

I was going to vote, instead i procrasterbates.

by Tom Kisner June 26, 2007

procrasterbating

Verb to 'procrasterbate'= To masterbate or 'have a wank' to pass the time when you are supposed to carry out another task.

"Hey Dom hows the job-hunting"
"haven't done any yet been procrasterbating over anything remotely sexual all day"

by Dom 'word smith' myers May 6, 2010

procrasterbating

The art of putting off important or useless assignments so you can masturbate, so good luck and don't get caught kiddy's

My Mom walked in on me Procrasterbating last night and all she was "Jimmy at least finish your homework".

by Jacob F; November 7, 2007