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Shower Philosopher

A person who commonly discusses the philosophies of life with his/her self while in the shower. Often times these people will come out of the shower with some realization of something in life.
Person 1: "What took you so long in there?"
Person 2: "I was wondering which language deaf people think in."
Person 1: "Ah. You must be a shower philosopher."
Person 2: "Yeah, I guess you could say that."
by mattywhack March 5, 2013
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Phacebook Philosopher

A person who in real life lacks actual intelligence but on social media regularly post "deep" statuses or tweets that show their "emotional" sides. Phacebook Philosophers rarely ever live by these teachings and these post are done almost purely to give the allusion of sophistication. They often tell of success and the future and sound good on paper. Occasionally they will sprinkle God's name in the post to add a religious aspect to the mix. The most common Phacebook Philosophers are hoes.
Hoe's Post on Facebook - "Everyone is gonna hurt you but you have to find the ones worth suffering for."

This hoe allows herself to be used continuously and is apparently oblivious to it. She is a Phacebook Philosopher.

Hoe's Post on Facebook - "Going to Bible Study tonight!!"

Little do you know that she is merely going for social purposes if at all. And the amount of dick she will suck afterwards will counteract any good she's done previously that day. She is a Phacebook Philosopher.
by In.The.AM October 18, 2013
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pothead philosophers

Someones who get drunk and stoned and engage in heavy philosophical conversations with nothing to back up their opinions other than their primal sincerity.
We are just pothead philosophers with no type of studious background whatsoever.
by KImCobain March 12, 2015
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Toilet Philosopher Syndrome

Toilet Philosopher Syndrome (aka TPS) occurs randomly while a person is shitting for too long. The most common symptom is the realization that whether he flushes or not doesnt matter because in the end everything will cease to exist.
Other known effects include but not limited to : Questioning one's existence, reading the shampoo bottles ingredient list, and having an existential crisis.
-hey man u know why the hell is that guy taking so long to take a shit?
-idk may be he has Toilet Philosopher Syndrome
by BiteZaDusto August 17, 2021
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Philosopher

The only kind of person that actually knows what he or she is talking about.
Psychiatrist: You need medication because I believe you are mentally ill.

Philosopher: All because you believe I'm mentally ill doesn't mean I am. Isn't it just as possible that you're mentally ill believing that I'm mentally ill without any real scientific evidence to back it up?
by Foolosopher84 January 25, 2011
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philosopher

The best kind of person. A person that just thinks about things, which then enables other people to do things.
Carpenter: I built a house.

Doctor: I saved a woman's life.

Scientist: I've designed the missle defense system our country uses.

Dumbass: I only measure direct contributions, and I fail to understand that it is possible for something to indirectly benefit society. I'm the kind of person that thinks that rebounds and assists are useless in basketball.

Philosopher: I am interested in a discipline that has given birth to democracy and other political theories, the natural sciences, psychology, and more recently, cognitive science. Without the work conducted in philosophy, a monarch could destroy the house that a carpenter built without any compensation, and the knowledge necessary to save a person's life or to build a missile defense system would have not likely occurred.

I use logic to reach conclusions that are either necessary, contingent, or contradictory (impossible). Computers and robotics would be impossible without my contributions to propositional calculus, first-order logic, temporal logic, and modal logic.
by Gottlob Frege October 10, 2008
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Coffee cup philosopher

A person who recites the sayings from coffee cups and acts like they have figured out the meaning of life
by Livinthelife May 31, 2015
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