Springfield, Missouri

A so-called "city" in Missouri--Springfield is more like a big small town. Many of it's residents suffer from small-town syndrome and many of the small business owners here think they are hot fucking tits and that their shit doesn't stink... all the while gentrifying the north part of the commercial district (actually just one street), ironically, most of these stores can't afford to stay open from 9 to 5. Residents of Springfield also enjoy not shutting the fuck up about cashew chicken or how bad the traffic is, even though the "city" literally takes 15 minutes to drive from one end to the other. For it's size, there are a surprising number of homeless people in Springfield contrasted by a church on literally every fucking corner where bible thumpers judge you and a ridiculous number of banks on every other corner. Downtown is full of frat douchebags going clubbing or diet liberals and wannabe hipsters who want you to know how woke they are and go to the same handful of bars... no need to worry though, some white dude with a beard and tattoos will probably open another brewery soon!

Person 1: "Springfield, Missouri is a really diverse place."

Person 2: "Isn't the demographic of Greene County over 90% white?"

by Story Time for Morons August 10, 2019

missouri lap-dance

This is the act of one taking a shit on a toilet whilst another sits on one's lap and shits in the space between his/her legs into the water below. The word missouri, come to find out after coining the term, in a native american dialect means muddy water

Oh man I ate so many corn dogs at the carnival that I had to rush home, no sooner than I dropped my first terd charlene was in there givin me the old missouri lap-dance. I guess she had one corndog too many as well.

by jihad massoud October 14, 2011

Missouri Jack Knife

When a person uses their busted teeth to cut someone during oral sex

I was getting head the other day and that bitch gave me a Missouri Jack Knife!

by loafnaround September 2, 2020

The misbourne

A shit school who used to have a nonce head teacher and now run by lord farquad from shrek. Everyone there thinks they are hard but they are all rich mummy boys.

Daniel: damnnn is that lord farquad at the misbourne ?
Ian: fuck since when was he a girl ? 2019 gender neutral gang shit

Lord farquad: don’t assume my gender REE

by Mcfatasstittybitch November 18, 2019

Missouri alarm clock

The act of taking ones penis and smacking someone in the forehead until they wake up.

I told Dave I would give him a Missouri alarm clock at about 7am.

by angela75 April 6, 2010

West Plains Missouri

If you want Meth, they've got it.

West Plains Missouri is so known for meth it is often referred to as Meth Plains

by Bfwangs June 23, 2017

Missouri Bean Dip

The act of spreading the ass with the 'cone' techquine so you can insert your testicles into the rectum while inserting you penis into the vagina.

That girl was so freaky that I did the Missouri Bean Dip last night!

by rusty'stache January 8, 2011