telectual

A Movie personality assumed to have some expertise in a given subject, but who is really just an academic flunky.

Dr. Phil is a really famous Telectual.

by Mr. Rags September 16, 2005

Telecomuniphobia

A fear of talking to somone over the telephone. This is caused due to text messaging too much. Symptoms often include refusing to call somone, or hanging up if anyone other then the intended person answers the phone.

"Why did he hang up without saying anything?"
"He has telecomuniphobia"

by Mattocks July 9, 2009

Tele-tuggy

A Tele-tuggy is essentially a hand job or "tuggy" given to a recipient who is watching television.

This is a play on the word "Teletubbie" which may give the illusion that a "tele-tuggy" is an inocent act which is not sexual in nature; making the persuit of tele-tuggies easier.

Cindy: Dave, why don't you turn off the TV and come to bed?

Dave: South Park is on... I have a better idea! Why don't you come over here and give me a tele-tuggy?

by TJ Trouble October 5, 2010

telecommuting

The ability to find yourself fully surrounded by incompetent idiots while working from the comfort of your own home.

I may be working in my pj's, but through the magic of telecommuting, I'm still stuck dealing with these morons all day.

by annoyed12345 May 11, 2011

Telecoprolism

The statistically anomalous tendency for the telephone to ring while you are having a shit. Extensive studies have shown that the phone of any individual has, at any given time, a 500% higher chance of ringing while its owner is evacuating his/her bowels than during other common everyday tasks such as masturbation, hoovering and chimping. Some schools of thought consider telecoprolism to be a subset of the Sod's Law principle. The others don't really consider such issues to be a worthy use of academic time and resources.

I was just settling down for my morning log and got telecoprolised by the bank again. Bloody telecoprolism, eh?

by Lancaster's Second Finest August 15, 2011

Teleboards

1. An underfunded, poorly-managed forum composed of dysfunctional 'regulars' who hail from North America, Australia, Ireland, the U.K., and one kid from Scandinavia. Escape is for the most part nearly impossible.

2. Cul-de-sac of dementia, anti-social behavior, and neurosis in general.

Examples of Dialogue:

"I hate this shithole. I'm leaving you fuckers."
"You'll be back."
" :rolleyes: "
"Kill yourself, you insert racial epithet or sexist remark."
"You're fired!"
"Fat Rob just posted another final fantasy thread."
"The council are threatening me with an anti-social behaviour order."
"I hate Bush."
"I love Bush."
"I hate everybody."

Et cetera.

by 8-B February 3, 2005

telecaster

An early electric guitar design by Leo Fender, which has a bolt on neck, bridge and neck single coil pickups, 1 volume, 1 tone, and 3-way toggle.
If you're looking for a twangy sound, look no further than a tele.
It is still one of the most recognizable guitars today, right behind the Stratocaster and Les Paul.

Joe Strummer of The Clash is famouse for playing a Telecaster.

by thepseudofriend July 29, 2004