A sexual maneuver where one:
a) consumes 20-25 alcoholic beverages in a night out.
b) sleazily, creepily finds an equally or more inebriated member of the female sex to bring back to one's room.
c) interrupts the pre-game makeout session to go and take 4-5 times the recommended dose of generic viagra purchased from an illegal online pharmacy.
d) continues to fail to get more than a half-mast erection, but due to utter insanity and a complete disconnect from reality, continues to push the issue and proceeds to perform hours of overzealous cunnilinguis.
e) eventually takes the submissive bottom and tries to cram the now-quarter mast erection into the female partner's vagina, which leads to the crux of The Metcalf maneuver: DUE TO THE FLACCIDITY OF THE ERECTION, IT MUST BE ABLE TO HAVE A KINK SOMEWHERE AT THE MIDPOINT LEADING THE SEX (IF YOU CAN CALL IT THAT) TO BE EXTREMELY PAINFUL. Advanced versions of The Metcalf actually include the penis being folded in half and then inserted.
To spice things up a bit, Metcalf practitioners can also forget where they are, claim wholeheartedly to their roomates that they had a threesome when in fact it didn't happen, pass out, blast music extremely loud, or say incoherent and frightening things.
a) consumes 20-25 alcoholic beverages in a night out.
b) sleazily, creepily finds an equally or more inebriated member of the female sex to bring back to one's room.
c) interrupts the pre-game makeout session to go and take 4-5 times the recommended dose of generic viagra purchased from an illegal online pharmacy.
d) continues to fail to get more than a half-mast erection, but due to utter insanity and a complete disconnect from reality, continues to push the issue and proceeds to perform hours of overzealous cunnilinguis.
e) eventually takes the submissive bottom and tries to cram the now-quarter mast erection into the female partner's vagina, which leads to the crux of The Metcalf maneuver: DUE TO THE FLACCIDITY OF THE ERECTION, IT MUST BE ABLE TO HAVE A KINK SOMEWHERE AT THE MIDPOINT LEADING THE SEX (IF YOU CAN CALL IT THAT) TO BE EXTREMELY PAINFUL. Advanced versions of The Metcalf actually include the penis being folded in half and then inserted.
To spice things up a bit, Metcalf practitioners can also forget where they are, claim wholeheartedly to their roomates that they had a threesome when in fact it didn't happen, pass out, blast music extremely loud, or say incoherent and frightening things.
I am such a fucking moron who sucks so hard at life: I pulled another Metcalf last night.
I would honestly rather become a fluffer on an all-male porn set than pull another Metcalf.
Yeah, it was the worst sexual experience of my life; he pulled a Metcalf on me.
I would honestly rather become a fluffer on an all-male porn set than pull another Metcalf.
Yeah, it was the worst sexual experience of my life; he pulled a Metcalf on me.
by JacksonBrownTown April 12, 2009
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1. To disclose illegal or immoral activities while unwittingly giving clues to the individual's true identity.
1. To disclose illegal or immoral activities while unwittingly giving clues to the individual's true identity.
by MrTIggr July 31, 2012
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Another word preferable to the more immature "Dirt Road" term.
Is a reference to poop stuck on your anal hairs.
Is a reference to poop stuck on your anal hairs.
-Oh dear, I can't crap due to the immense metcalfing of my anal region.
-Oh shit, I forgot to wipe my bum properly and now sport a massive metcalfe.
-Oh shit, I forgot to wipe my bum properly and now sport a massive metcalfe.
by Alex Metcalfe June 11, 2006
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Get the thomas metcalfe mug.A school located in on the exact border between Burnsville and Eagan. It is one out of three junior highs in district 191. Aside from its bugs and teachers who never seem to age, there is quite the mix of kids. From preppy kids who think they're the crap, to ghetto kids who hang out in gangs. Though going there is a pain in the butt, it is still better than its counterparts aka Eagle Ridge (annoying ass rich thots and tools) and Nicollet (scary hood kids & dirty faucets) Beware the STEM kids at Metcalf are quite...nerdy. Metcalf is known for its chess team that places nationally, but to the students who aren't on the team, it is a thing used to make fun of people. MJH also has many clubs that meet maybe twice a year and are a joke to not only the students, but also other schools.
*Can also mean a mixture on ghetto and preppy or two-faced
*Can also mean a mixture on ghetto and preppy or two-faced
by rad booty January 24, 2015
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