When your download speed steadily decreases as you near the completion of the download, such that your download will get infinitely close to finishing, but never actually finish.
The program said it'd take about 3 minutes to finish, but thanks to download asymptote it ended up taking 3 hours.
by solargambler March 15, 2013
Get the download asymptote mug.The mathematical function that describes how you can’t really get all of the shit off your asshole by wiping. It is asymptotic and tends towards 0 as a function of number of wipes, but never quite gets there.
With a bidet, it’s actually possible to clean your asshole completely. Wiping just follows the asshole asymptote.
by weyus November 9, 2022
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An asymptote is a person who you get closer and closer to you but never touches you.
Derived from the term in analytic geometry.
Derived from the term in analytic geometry.
Roo Roo came over last night and had her in the bed for ages and got absolutely nothing. She's such an asymptote.
by Pigballs January 23, 2016
Get the Asymptote mug.A mathematical term. It describes a line or equation of a line that would approach a certain point never go all the way. Taught to algebra or pre-calc students.
It can also be a term that describes a person who wishes to be in a relationship with another person, gets close to that person as time goes on but never actually ask her/him out for some reason
Usually they quit after the person gets into a relationship but in some cases they extend to infinity
can become stalkers
in some cases the other person realize their affection, which is their goal, and result in happy ending
It can also be a term that describes a person who wishes to be in a relationship with another person, gets close to that person as time goes on but never actually ask her/him out for some reason
Usually they quit after the person gets into a relationship but in some cases they extend to infinity
can become stalkers
in some cases the other person realize their affection, which is their goal, and result in happy ending
example: y=1/x
Person A: Al is always hanging out with Christina these days
Person B: yeah Al is definitely into her
Person A: Did he tell her yet?
Person B: no he is too shy
Person A: man that is tough. how long is he going to keep this up?
-ten years later at Allison's wedding
Person A: how's Al doing these days
Person B: pretty good. look he's best man
Person A: wow he is one tough asymptote
Person A: Al is always hanging out with Christina these days
Person B: yeah Al is definitely into her
Person A: Did he tell her yet?
Person B: no he is too shy
Person A: man that is tough. how long is he going to keep this up?
-ten years later at Allison's wedding
Person A: how's Al doing these days
Person B: pretty good. look he's best man
Person A: wow he is one tough asymptote
by hobos_on_trains April 3, 2010
Get the asymptote mug.Refers to being in quarantine or self-isolation for an indefinite period of time, and the resulting paranoia and pessimism. Similar to a "Debbie Downer", "Negative Nancy", etc.
Person one: "Is this gonna be forever?"
Person two: "Oh, hush. Quit being such an asymptomatic asymptote."
Person two: "Oh, hush. Quit being such an asymptomatic asymptote."
by qfwfqsnmcvr May 12, 2020
Get the asymptomatic asymptote mug.A prostitute with dwarf-like stature.
by Hu Dun Poo April 24, 2011
Get the asymptope mug.Pre-AP Algebra 2 Teacher: Today we are going to learn about asymptotes.
Class Clown: Can't we listen to some bad asymptote music instead?
Two years later...
AP Calculus Teacher: Today we are covering differentiability. Corners, cusps and breaks are not differentiable.
Student #1: What is she talking about?
Student #2: I don't know. Who cares?
Student #3: Hey, did y'all hear about the bad ass fight in the cafeteria?
Calculus Teacher: Student #3, I did hear about the bad asymptote fight, but if you want to pass the AP Calculus Test so that you don't have to take Calculus in college, I suggest we focus on the fact that corners, cusps, and breaks are not differentiable. And yes, breaks can be asymptotes or holes.
Here's a fun way to remember what a break is: A BREAK-up in a romantic relationship is usually due to a partner being an ASS-ymptote. Use your imaginations with the word HOLES...
Class Clown: Can't we listen to some bad asymptote music instead?
Two years later...
AP Calculus Teacher: Today we are covering differentiability. Corners, cusps and breaks are not differentiable.
Student #1: What is she talking about?
Student #2: I don't know. Who cares?
Student #3: Hey, did y'all hear about the bad ass fight in the cafeteria?
Calculus Teacher: Student #3, I did hear about the bad asymptote fight, but if you want to pass the AP Calculus Test so that you don't have to take Calculus in college, I suggest we focus on the fact that corners, cusps, and breaks are not differentiable. And yes, breaks can be asymptotes or holes.
Here's a fun way to remember what a break is: A BREAK-up in a romantic relationship is usually due to a partner being an ASS-ymptote. Use your imaginations with the word HOLES...
by faithyeni November 13, 2011
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