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Jizzed up Jesus

An insult directed towards long haired males who are acting rowdy, obnoxious and like to jizz every where. Similar to a long haired square except more spherical.
He catapults off of the couch with tremendous force projecting jizz onto the walls which take the shape of white clouds. While jizzing mid air, he is high above all of his peoples and henceforth becomes Jizzed up Jesus.

Blaise just jumped off the couch and jizzed everywhere, what a Jizzed up Jesus.
by dan_gleewang January 1, 2021
mugGet the Jizzed up Jesusmug.

Jesus Girl Scout

A Girl Scout that try's to sell cookies... and try’s to sell you a religion because surprise they are also a Jehovah’s witness
Jesus Girl Scout:“I would like to sell you cookies... and a spot in heaven!”

Person: “Go away you stupid Jesus Girl Scout”
by Cancer dog March 7, 2020
mugGet the Jesus Girl Scoutmug.

jesus h dick

When someone with a big dick fucks you
Jesus h dick that felt good
by Dndhbf January 15, 2018
mugGet the jesus h dickmug.

The Baby-Jesus Effect

When your mates are losing so hard in trivia you do a shoey with sardines and beer to get back up to scratch

Cheers youngy
Boys were getting fucked up so I had to pull out The Baby-Jesus Effect
by The Cousins March 8, 2017
mugGet the The Baby-Jesus Effectmug.

anti-Jesus christians

A person who identifies themselves as Christian, but rejects the teachings of Jesus, by inventing morals and laws that allow them to reject the needs of others of another tribe or color.
The anti-Jesus Christians chose to hate the poor and downtrodden because they felt they were lazy and unworthy of Christ’s love.
by KernelDan September 30, 2022
mugGet the anti-Jesus christiansmug.

pray to Jesus shits

Those really urgent bathroom trips where your stomach is cramping the whole time and it won’t stop coming out, so you literally pray to Jesus
Bruh, I just had one of those pray to Jesus shits
by YaboyNick2019 July 5, 2019
mugGet the pray to Jesus shitsmug.

jesus suffering fuck

The most awesomely hardcore blasphemous thing you can say. Try to reserve this amazing phrase to times which require a little extra. Like when the earth explodes, or you wake up to find a 50ft high dildo standing over your girlfriend’s corpse quietly singing god save the queen.
Boss: You're fired. Oh and I fucked your wife and she died.
Miguel: Eh.
Boss: Wtf.
Miguel: My job and wife were boring me. Time to purge myself and move on.
Miguel (walking out yells over shoulder): Hey! By the way, that wasnt my wife. I put your wife in disguise.
Boss: JESUS SUFFERING FUCK!
by Grant Hayes May 6, 2005
mugGet the jesus suffering fuckmug.

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