pencil jockeying

when an overpaid lawyer deliberately manipulates paperwork so that a client is dismissed of his/her charges and walks away from a situation that they were guilty of.

Can you believe all the pencil jockeying that goes on in the american judicial system today?

by Mickey Darling August 4, 2009

pencil squeezer

Masturbator

Wanker

Onenist

Verse of Ian Dury song:

'There ain't half been some clever bastards.
Van Gogh did some eyeball pleasers.
He must have been a pencil squeezer.
He didn't do the Mona Lisa,
That was an Italian geezer'.

Also:

That rubber necked, pencil squeezer Ed Milliband couldn't organize a piss up in a brewery, let alone an effective government ...

by D B Cooper June 6, 2013

Mike pencing

When you fuck up the first line of a speech by having no clue where the fuck you even are, let alone any clue of what you're about to say for the next 90 minutes.

Mike Pencing - I'm glad to be with you all here on the moon where I actually think Donald Trump could be the next moon President.

by GET_SICK October 5, 2016

peinis

A long male body part

I will give you love with my peinis

by swager666 November 10, 2017

Hillbilly pencil holder

The buttcrack. You can keep your pencils there, if you flex.

I bent over to pick up the pencil I dropped, but my friend stuck his pencil in my crack and yelled "hillbilly pencil holder!"

by EDKirk June 1, 2011

pencil bin

A device used by filthy sluts to urinate in while intoxicated.

Damn, that filthy slut pissed in my pencil bin while she was drunk.

by Mark Snicher April 5, 2005

penice

Two or more penises, at the same location simultaneously.

Sean suckes penice, he is a slut, because otherwise, he would only be sucking one cock (particularly Patrick Moschiano's).

by Damn It All To The Depths Of Hell! August 21, 2007