full turtle

When something is so awkward/horrifying you pull your shirt, jacket or sweatshirt to cover your face. Normally this contains/disguises your laughing fit.

Someone looked up what truffle butter was, I full turtled for 5 min.

by Reallyallnamesaretaken April 17, 2015

Turtle retreat

When a bitch is taking a literal shit and you ram your cock up her ass.

Damn dog you made that "turtle retreat"

by Turtle tickler October 08, 2016

Pettin’ the Turtle

A situation when one takes an incomplete shit, leaving a protruding “turtle head” behind. The shitter then must pet the lodged turtle head approximately 70 times with toilet paper or moist wipes, shitter’s choice of course.

Mary was pettin’ the turtle for a solid hour after the lunch special at Benihana.

by Daddylongdick813 October 30, 2019

my turtles

Used as a pick-up line to refer to ones own pubic hair(s). pubs bush exotic turtle hairy

Would you like to go look at my turtles, they are pretty exotic.

by Smokey's pubs February 25, 2014

Condom Turtle

A visible erection through the condom.

I leaned over, in an attempt to hide my condom turtle.

by DashiellShatter May 30, 2023

turtle peepee

when you put just the tip in

person 1: “turtle peepee?”
person 2: “geheheggerrrrgrggr YES!”

by thelegsonthebusgostepstepstep September 03, 2021

Land turtle

Madelyn is a land turtle not a fish

Omg look at Madelyn she is a land turtle.

by May 11, 2022