International Break the Law Day

April 11th is international break the law day. On this day you are supposed to post a picture of you breaking the law on Social Media or post a photo of an illegal item in your possession.

“It’s international break the law day! Everyone post pictures of your illegal guns!”

by LobsterMaster April 11, 2021

Edwards first law of sleep

An object asleep tends to stay asleep unless acted upon by the mother.

Due to Edwards first law of sleep I was late for school because my mother did not come to check on me in th morning.

by Unknownpapyus10 June 17, 2018

Your in-laws are coming to stay

Some of the worst news one can get. Literally makes you dread it for months.

Boss: You’re fired
Me: Damn
Bank: Your bank account has been frozen

Me: Shit!
Sister: hey did your wife tell you that your in-laws are coming to stay?
Me: NOOOOOO!!!!!

by Xxxxxxxxfanboyxxxxxxxxxx November 13, 2020

step-co-sibling-in-law

Spouse's stepsibling's spouse.

My step-co-sibling-in-law is a good person.

by Wonbig October 13, 2021

Murphy's Law of Checkout-Lines

"If you aren't in a hurry to leave the store, there will be little or no delay in getting a clerk to ring you up. But if you're pressed for time --- or even more so, if you're car-pooling with someone who is on a tight schedule --- THAT'S when there will be hold-ups galore... a long line in front of you, a customer with one or more heaped-full shopping-carts, one or more price-discrepancies that hafta be tediously resolved (i.e., the puzzled clerk is obliged to walk back with you to the shelf to look at the price-labels, a supervisor or the store-manager has to be called over), a balky card-scanner, etc."

Whenever someone who's giving me a ride is kind enough to let me stop at a store to grab a few items, I always try to make very sure that I have everything all "set and prepared" before I head to the register, so that I personally seldom create a problem (i.e., cause any delays myself with issues like not having the proper payment ready or being unsure of a price or quantity) with Murphy's Law of Checkout-Lines. That way, even if my driver has to wait linger than expected for me to hastily scamper back outside with my loaded shopping-bags, he won't be able to direct his impatient frustration at me --- "Sorry for the delay; I did indeed get everything tossed in my cart very quickly, but there was a long line in front of me, and they were short-staffed today, so they only had once register open."

by QuacksO October 31, 2019

Murphy's Law of Clothes-drying

Similar to the old "wax your car if you want it to rain" joke, this saying reads: "It can be mild and sunny for days on end, but then just as soon as you hang out a whole bunch o' laundry to dry, THAT'S when da sun will abruptly disappear behind huge dark clouds and you'll have a bleepin' MONSOON FOR A WEEK!"

The weather had been totally "bright 'n' balmy" for a good while, and so one afternoon last week I tried to save money and electricity by using my clothesline instead of the watts-sucking dryer, but then it rained heavily during the night, and it's been foggy and drizzly ever since! Sounds like a classic case of "Murphy's Law of Clothes-drying" to me.

by QuacksO October 30, 2018

half-co-aunt-in-law

Spouse's half-pibling's wife.

My half-co-aunt-in-law is a good person.

by Wonbig October 13, 2021