Cracker-Jackass 

1) The guy selling Cracker Jack at Fenway who runs down the aisle then screams at the bottom "WHO WANTS CRACKER JACKS??"

2) The guy at Fenway who stands up during an at-bat to wave down the Craker Jack vendor so his kid/girlfriend/gay lover can fish through the box for a prize.

3) see also Crunch n' Ass-Munch

"Hey, sit down cracker-jackass!!"

Cracker-Jackass by barry mcsorely April 24, 2009

have a little sympathy for the jackass down south 

Pick-up line for the desperate.

"Hey, can I buy you a drink?"
"No"
"Have a little sympathy for the jackass down south!"
"...I'm getting a restraining order."

have a little sympathy for the jackass down south by NotARapist April 24, 2005

right lane jackass 

Right lane jackass (n): Refers to a driver in the right lane of a multilane street approaching an intersection where the light is red; AND these four other conditions are present: 1) There is plenty of room to be in the middle lane, 2) The driver has no intention of turning right, 3) Cars behind the RLJ have their right blinkers on well in advance of the intersection in the hopes that the driver will notice and move to the other lane and allow them to turn right on red; however 4) The driver is clueless as to his or her surroundings.

Optional criteria, not required for the definition, but frequently present: 1) Drivers behind the RLJ with their blinkers on appear pissed. 2) The intersection has an unusually long cycle time before the light turns green, 3) There is virtually no cross traffic. 4) The RLJ's car has its fuel door open, with the gas cap hanging out.

Passenger: "My contractions are getting closer together. You need to take a right at the next intersection to get to the hospital!"
Driver: "Keep breathing Dear. I'll just put my right turn signal on so that guy in front of us knows to pull to the left before the intersection so we don't have to wait for that light."
Passenger: "He's not pulling over, he just stopped and blocked the right lane, and he's not even turning. Why would he do that?"
Driver: "because he's a right lane jackass and he's clueless. Better hold your legs closed, we may be here awhile"

right lane jackass by MeDavebo September 29, 2014

Lead Footed Pepperoni Jackass

A pizza delivery driver who is speeding, driving recklessly, etc...

That Dumbinoes pizza driver is driving like a lead footed pepperoni jackass.

Lead Footed Pepperoni Jackass by JayyTheOrc December 18, 2019

Stonewall Jackass 

A person who gives you a hard time about something for seemingly no reason. A person who enjoys being withholding.

That lady at the DMV is a real Stonewall Jackass. She made me wait for an hour in 3 different lines when she could have helped me in 2 minutes.

Stonewall Jackass by PMcC1 January 11, 2010

Professional Jackass

Someone who has been such a jackass that the person has become famous for it.

Osama Bin Laden: I am a professional jackass, and I'm proud of it! And I'm in hell for it! I love being a terrorist!

Professional Jackass by Theassfuckerfromapartment1107 December 18, 2012

Certified Jackass 

A person who consistently acts like a dumbass but thinks of himself as a smartass. A certified Jackass may never be thankful, no matter how nice someone has been to him.

In other words, a Certified Jackass is someone who shows traits of a Jackass on a regular basis.

Person: I left you an a treat on your desk
Certified Jackass: Does that mean you are ass kissing me now?
Person: Great! So instead of thanking, you are going to be a Certified Jackass that you are!

Certified Jackass by Smurf with Blue Eye Liner June 16, 2012