Bert

An old fashion name that people don't normally name their kids this. People make fun of them because the show Sesame Street Bert and Ernie

"Hey look it's Bert, where is Ernie?"
"Bert have you found Ernie yet?"

by Marisol.R May 21, 2018

Bert Alert

When an emergency meeting is called and you get a boner

Shit! uhhhh... bert alert...

by Bert alert October 28, 2020

old bert

Evil incarnate. If you run into an Old Bert it is best to try and escape before it notices you are there. If escape is not possible then trying to make a deal to spare your life is the best option. Old Bert's feed on the human soul and if hungry will stop at nothing to get it's next meal. If already fed then it's personality will revert to a calm state, although if angered it would be lucky if the body was found in a piece larger then a finger nail. It is best to avoid Old Bert's at all cost but the reward for capturing one alive is enough to get you your own private island with money to spare. Approach Old Bert's at own risk with full knowledge that it will most likely eat you and your soul.

You hear about the city that was destroyed, apparently an Old Bert caused it.

by Old_Bert July 8, 2017

Ernie and Bert Syndrome

Ernie and Bert Syndrome is the rare case of when two men declare homosexuality and get into a relationship with each other, but also declare asexuality, effectively making them just friends.

"Tim and Jerry are gay but they both said they're asexual."
"So that makes them just friends then. There's a term for that. Its called Ernie and Bert Syndrome."

by cyn!c August 27, 2018

Bert

*Bert*
_Bert /bɜ t/ n. (Rhyming slang)_

* The grand finale where an artiste, giving a rhythmic performance from behind, pulls his hampton out at just the right moment to unload his gentleman's relish all over his partner's back, as in the unforgettable style of legendary singer-songwriter Bert Batterbach.

(To spunk up someones back)

I was giving her a good un from behind, then just as I got my wizard’s shoes on, I whipped it out and gave her the full Bert

by doctornellie May 28, 2025

Bert Kreischer sit-ups

Bert Kreischer sit-ups is a highly competitive exercise competition requiring each participant to insert a well lubricated prosthetic penis and or phallic shaped object(s) into the anus prior to performing maximum effort sit-ups. The goal is to perform the maximum amount of repetitions each round prior to the prosthetic penis and or phallic shaped object(s) fully dislodging from the body. A winner will be determined following ten rounds of continuous play with no more than a one minute break in between rounds.

…those last few rounds of Bert Kreischer sit-ups was a gut check!

by Mr SlapNTickle March 20, 2023

Skinny Bert Newton

A special breed of human, can be found wining and dining birds in high class establishments otherwise he's usually running around in creeks like some regular old creek nigga, doesn't mind the send or a few nose beers when he gets the chance.

"Fuck me! Thats skinny bert newton!"

by shackwiz January 14, 2019