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ass shelf

any surface at around ass level that serves as a make shift seat. Common types of ass shelves are window sills, arms of chairs, any sort of ledge, and if your creative your friends. As the word "shelf" suggests in the term, ass shelves serve as the perfect place to store your ass when a regular chair just won't do the trick.
Queefy: " Oh hey, who would have known that your arm would make such a great seat! I could sit here for days."
Hoeleen:"Don't look at me...I'm not ok with being your ass shelf!"
Queefy: "Lies...your loving every second of being my ass shelf ;) ! "
by PresOfDaFriends June 18, 2011
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Dick Shelf

A place for a man to rest his penis after sex.
Friend 1: Aw man I just had the best threesome of my life, mind if I use this as a dick shelf?
Friend 2: Dude, that's my keyboard!

or

Friend 2: Dude, that's my girlfriend's head!
Friend 1: Yea, she makes a good dick shelf.
by FishHookers February 24, 2008
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Related Words

backdoor top shelf

when you can't decide which hole to put it in and you are in a group so you don't wanna say you just fucked a girl in the ass, because that is kinda crude. it is when you have butt sex but will not be confused with doggy style sex
friend 1: dude, i fucked that one chick

friend 2: no way whatd you do

friend 1: i went backdoor top shelf on the ho
by bonerwars99 April 26, 2010
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Top Shelf

When two men engage in double penetration (DP) of a female the man in the top hole is going "top shelf".
Dude, I'm down to DP this chick with you but I'm calling top shelf all the way. I don't want your bag slapping all over me.
by nemensclubmpls March 25, 2012
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top shelf cheddar

The most rare form of cheddar in the world. Cheddar only forged in highest and most remote parts of the Appalachian Mountains. The cheddar must be cured for up to 10 years at a minimum and can only be harvested and extracted for its rich flavors when a player in the NHL scores a goal Upper 90/Top Shelf/Upper Benjamin's.
I want the good stuff, that top shelf cheddar, none of this shit for concentrate.
by A. Ovechkin October 17, 2015
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lumpy shelf

A beard that a late teen is trying to grow to make themselves look like a man but ends up looking like a lumpy shelf
Your beard is giving me lumpy shelf vibes
by Cockwood February 16, 2021
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Titty shelf

When a woman is so fat or pregnant and their stomach sticks out so far their titties instead of hanging down to their belly button they rest on her titty shelf.
Look at the size of that woman. She is so big her breasts are resting on her titty shelf.
by kellycrew January 27, 2022
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