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Hoboken Squat Cobbler

When a fully clothed person sits in a pie (or other cake like pastry) and commences to weep like a little girl. Squat Cobblering is usually engaged in by ugly, bald, middle aged men, who usually have some form of what appears to be mild autism. Said mild autism may manifest itself in an childlike, irrational and downright creepy obsession with baseball cards.
Did you see the back of his pants? He either crapped'em, or Hoboken Squat Cobbler'd a chocolate cake.
by Bob Barr 123 August 28, 2016
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squat cobbler

A type of fetish involving a fully clothed adult sits in a pie and wiggles around.

Extreme versions of the squat cobbler exist such as acts involving tears (cry baby squats).
squat cobbler...you know what squat cobbler is...
by shakkkkaaaa August 28, 2016
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squat cobbler

When a man sits in a pie.
WOW! Nice squat cobbler you did back there!
by mememachine11 August 25, 2016
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squat cobbler

A fetish act involving a nude male squatting into a pie with genitalia and anus, at which point a wiggle is performed.
The art patron paid for videos of a squat cobbler.
by bettercall August 23, 2016
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squat cobbler

As featured on "Better Call Saul", Season 2, episode 2, "Cobbler", the act of sitting bare assed in a cream pie and wiggling your butt around in it. Considered a sexual fetish by some.
Erik was paid $500 for each video he made of him performing a squat cobbler. Chocolate cream was said to be the favorite.
by BootyToSpare August 22, 2016
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squat cobbler

The fetish act performed by a nude male, or female squatting their gentitalia into a pie and wiggling. Also known as Boston Creme Splat, Double moon moon pie, and Dutch Apple Ass. Coined by Saul Goodman in 'Better Call Saul'.
The art patron purchased videos from the man doing a squat cobbler.
by bettercall August 21, 2016
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squat cobbler

Fetish. A squat cobbler is a person who sits in pie in order to sexually arouse a partner. Often, a squat cobbler will wear a costume and/or cry while performing the fetish. See also: Full Moon Pie, Boston Crème Splat.
Roger enjoyed treating his partner with increasingly elaborate squat cobbler performances, but unfortunately his dwindling budget for premium pies and laundry fees put a damper on the fun.
by w. munny August 20, 2016
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