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big telly pokey bum wank

The insertion of your finger or object into your rectum whilst masturbating / jerking off, to increase pleasure while watching pornography or sexually stimulating broadcast material to enhance the experience, either on television or vvia internet streaming on computer, smartphone or tablet.
He was so aroused by the two lesbians performing cullingus on each other on late-night television, he couldn't resist giving himself a big telly pokey bum wank.
by Mackem Beefy September 19, 2021
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Wank and dank

Tyrone asked Jamal what he’s been doing lately and tyron said just wank and dank
by Yeye ass haircut January 29, 2021
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Ad wank

A challenge of wanking during an advert break and climaxing before your television programme returns. The ability to do so can vary depending on the content and length of the adverts.
Today, I succeeded with my first ad wank. I'm officially an ad wanker.
by Mottymania May 9, 2019
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pooey bum wank

When you've just finished pooing and the moment takes you before you wipe
Aaron: I had a pooey bum wank to your wife last night

Jake: Dude! you could've wiped first!
by Freeboy March 10, 2023
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wank block

The random things that happen when you‘re just trying to wank. Especially in combination to watching porn. Doesnt matter if you‘re just starting or already in the midst of it, something just has to happen to stop you.
I was starting to wank when all of a sudden I receive 10 messages, 2 emails and then there is even an incoming call from my mum. I havent gotten any notifications all day until now! Typical wank block!
by xyz1999 October 1, 2020
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WANK

The sound Captain Americas shield makes when hitting something.

Established in:
Captain America #366
Cap:"I hate Nazis"
Shield: *WANK*
by RhodosGuard September 9, 2017
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a nigel suicide speed wank

when your having a wank just before blowing your mayonnaise load, shout out Mum!!!!(diseased and rotting). bring my dinner up please, then try and finish the job before she gets into your room
by mrs tosser October 19, 2025
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