close encounter of the turd kind

1. Having a negative experience with a douchebag of a person.

2. When you step on dog poop.

3. When a monkey flings his poop and *wham! splat* catches you.

4. Any doo-related major life experience

"Whooooaaa, dude, I heard you and Ryan yelling at each other all night!" "Yeah, it was a close encounter of the turd kind."

"Hey, why are you dragging your foot and what's that smell?" "Close encounter of the turd kind."

"Damn you evil little monkey, did not expect that close encounter of the turd kind!"

"Shane and I had a close encounter of the turd kind."

by mindenoodle February 11, 2010

Closet Heterosexual

A straight man/woman who pretends to be gay with the hope of sleeping with a member of the opposite sex, playing on the possible fantasy of "converting" them.

Girl: How do you know you don't like women if you've never slept with one?
"Gay" Guy: I don't know. I never really thought about it.
Girl: We should totally fuck.
"Gay" Guy: Well... I guess I could *try* it, sure. ;)
*30 minutes later*...
"Gay" Guy: Yeah so, I'm actually a closet heterosexual and just wanted to get in your pants.

by Burnt Coffee October 31, 2008

Closet Boyfriend

When a guy dates a girl and they only see eachother at the girl's convenience, hence taking him out of the closet once in a while when needed or to just make the guy feel like he matters, then put back in and forgotten about for an extended period of time. This can also be the other way around too.

-Damn i rarely ever see Mark and Tracy together

-Thats because he's just her closet boyfriend

by some1 who knows June 18, 2008

Closet

The place where gay people hide their true selves.

I would like to exit the closet, but there is a Bible wedged too tight under the door. Help.

by Bart June 4, 2003

Monster Closet

Monster Closet: origin: Noun. Wolfenstein 3-D. but has also been found in later games such as Doom, Doom II, and the recent Doom III. Monster Closets are defined as being small chambers that monsters lurk in awaiting a victim to approach a certain vicinity or acquire a triggered object. Upon tripping said trigger, the wall (closest to the victim) of the Monster Closet is suddenly opened effectively causing the victim to wet his/her pants in terror and spray gunfire wildly in an attempt to erradicate said monster.

Person 1: "I totally hate the new Doom III game."

Person 2: "Why's that?"

Person 1: "Because it's full of monster closets that constantly make me have to change my underwear."

by [q3w]The Soup Nazi September 10, 2005

Closet Genius

1. One who is not smart in school but smart in life though never showing it.

2. One who is very smart in school but never show's their true potential.

Person 1: Hey, what's wrong?
Person 2: Well my parents are getting a divorce....
Person 1: Its ok, things like this happen, you just gotta cheer up and move on.
Person 2: Thanks man!
later that day....
Person 2: What did you get on your algebra test?
Person 1: A D-....
Person 2: Dude, you're such a closet genius.

by RAWRdragon January 17, 2009

closet creeper

a person who seems completely normal at first, and then when you get to know them or spend time with them turns out to be a creeper

Brad is such a closet creeper.

by lovergirl89 March 19, 2008