The Bachelor

A reality show on ABC that puts 25 desperate and lonely Bachelorettes in competition with each other over a lonely, desperate Bachelor they don’t even know in the hopes that he will propose at the end of the season. These women are subdued by his looks, success,his charm, and his money, and mistakingly believe they are in love with him when they don’t even know him from Adam. Each week the Bachelorettes are given some time to be alone with the Bachelor, sometimes to the point of having sex with him, in the hopes he will be more likely to choose them. One crazy woman even gave the Bachelor on the last season her underwear upon meeting him for the first time, proving her overhwhelming lonliness and desperation (he eliminated her right away). At the end of each episode, the Bachelor gives a rose to the girls he wants to continue to the next round. In the closing weeks of the season the Bachelor travels to the ladies’ hometown to see her family and takes a weekend trip with her (probably having sex with her). In the last epsiode the Bachelor is seen searching for a ring for the lady he has chosen, and in the final moments finally chooses between two Bachelorettes left as to which lady he wants to be with.

The Bachelor makes me so sick that an STD test is necessary after watching it.

by [e-mail] April 28, 2008

bacharack

A man so envious of other men's larger penises that he cannot function in his daily life; all his thoughts and energy is spent thinking about how it would be to have a normal penis.

"Look at that sorry bastard sitting there moping and staring at guys' crotches, he's such an bacharack."

by Mr. good goods May 4, 2009

Bachelor Surprise

many times a bachelor will find himself without any definate meal to eat and may decide to resort to Bachelor surprise, Bachelor surprise involves closing ones eyes and picking completely random items from any place food is stored (fridge, cupboard, etc) the items selected are then made into dinner for the night. (seasonings need not be random due to high risk of a terrible outcome)

"damn, i dont have any real meals, looks like its time for bachelor surprise"
*receives various items*
"ok, a pizza pop, chipotle sauce, marble cheese, sausage, and a wrap. looks like im about to invent the southwest pizza wrap."

by Jazz Hammerhands August 9, 2009

Bachelor logic

That special brand of logic that spawns from a young adult male when left to his own devices. Usually centered around various "fixits" and customs around the house.

"I've only got ground meat in the fridge. That's a little bare on its own. I've got bread though. Fried meat on bread. That's practically a hamburger right there"
"Dude. That's bachelor logic"

by Daemus November 27, 2009

Bachelor of Cannabis

Aquired by ingesting marijuana approximately every day over the course of 4 years.

Many users of cannabis will ingest it for longer periods of time, hence persuing a cannabis degree at the Masters or PhD level.

Tim: I think it is time I rapped things up and stopped living high.

Mark: Wow are you really deciding to change? Quitter...

Tim: Ugh, I'm doing this because it's for the best of society, my family, and peers. Not because I want to. The high life is the higher life which only some individuals who have high intelligence and confidence can obtain while high.

Mark: So you're settling with only a Bachelor of Cannabis?

Tim: Yes

by Goondued November 5, 2011

[may bach money]

Enough money to buy a maybach ( a $1,300,000 car)

I'm gettin may bach money.

by macemoody December 16, 2008

son of a bachelor

Indicating a man was of illegitimate birth as his father was not and is still not married. Not to be confused with son of a bitch where bachelor is sometimes substituted for bitch. Melvile used the phrase in Typee. Not sure if he was substituting but I was struck with the subtlety.

Well sir , I will respect your mother but you are one sorry son of a bachelor.

Greeting: What’s up you motherles sons of bachelors?

by Wikidictionarymiki February 13, 2018