Turtle Squatter

Someone who squats hard and lets things get under their shell. "Turtle Squatter"

"Turtle Squatting"

someone who squats hard and lets something get under their shell and bothering them long-term.

Noah stop being such a turtle squatter!!!

by gnome dog May 30, 2011

Turtle

n. An awkward person
v. to shrug and stay shrugged for a period of time due to an awkward or cringy situation

My girlfriend is such a turtle.
I just turtled so hard

by Gabisaurous Rex May 8, 2018

Wet Turtle Cream

(verb) when a man makes a pan of delicious brownies, and immediatly upon removal from the oven, inserts his dick directly into the center of the steaming hot brownie pan then immediately sticks his erect dick into ice cream.

"Hey Greg, would you like a brownie? They are fresh and very hot."
"Sure, I'd love one...Wait, what the hell? Why is there a hole in the middle of the pan of brownies?"
"I wet Turtled them."
"Oh Fred, you scank!"
"Ginkies Greg! All I did was wet Turtled them... hey do you have any ice cream?"
"Why yes Fred we have some cookies and cream, would you like some?"
"Yes sure, bring it over I will scoop some for us."
"Ginkies Fred I can give you an ice cream scooper, why are you scooping it with your dick?"
"Um duh Greg haven't you ever heard of a wet Turtle cream? Creme de la crem dude."

by Orange Kookaburra September 2, 2022

Turtling

When you have to poop really bad and you feel it oozing out your ass

Hey man brb I think I'm turtling

by Cupacorn September 13, 2017

Acoustic turtle

A term used to describe someone who is acting acoustic or just plain fucking stupid.

Person 1: “Ignorance is a side effect of anger”
Person 2: “I’m not ignoring u”
Person 1: “You’re such an acoustic turtle”

by Totally not Eric_Bob November 11, 2017

turtled up

When a guy gets so cold, his dick draws up inside himself to the point of looking as though he may be uncut, even though he isn't.

Man, it's so damn cold in here I was turtled up and had to pull my dick out of myself just to take a leak.

I think... but it was so damn long I forget, I have a hangover and I'm gonna need chemo.

by dj_nafi November 25, 2014

Sigma Turtling

When you bring yourself to the edge of a climax while simultaneously holding in a poop then release the load and turd at the same time and reach a Nirvana-like state of being

"Hey bro, last night I was totally Sigma Turtling to Oprah Winfrey!"
"Sweet bro!"

by DoctaPurp July 10, 2024