jazz hands

Ejaculating into your hand after realizing you have no toilet paper.

"oh dear, no toilet paper......urgh, jazz hands it is then"

by richyrichyrichyrichy April 12, 2007

Hand Job

A manicure.

I went into the spa and asked for a hand job. They sat me down at a table and the technician across from me buffed my nails, trimmed my cuticles, and massaged lotion into my hands. It was a relaxing experience and I left satisfied.

by Grammy in the Red House January 17, 2010

Jazz Hands

When a persons hands shake uncontrolably from alcohol withdrawl.

Man, Just thinking about an ice cold beer right now is giving me a mean case of Jazz Hands!

by Blanket boy May 26, 2009

ham-hands

the uncontrolable desire of masturbating with a glazed porkroast

Watch out sir, he's got the ham-hands today...

by James Corvarse January 19, 2005

Left handed

Someone who is left handed is the devil's child. If you know anyone who is left handed, call the police to perform a ritual on them.

*At the basketball gym*
Some random guy: yo why are you so good with your left hand?
Me: Oh I'm left handed.
Them: NO GET AWAY

by follow me @AMerryHalloween November 10, 2019

hand soap

There are 3 types of hand soap. One type is the foaming kind which is softer and more fun for kids to play with while washing their hands.
Another type of soap is liquid soap. It has about the same consistency as shampoo. It's an average soap and easiest to use.
The final type of soap is bar soap. To use it, put water on your hands, then rub the soap on your hands. These soap bars are slippery so be careful.

Joe: "This bar soap is so slippery! I hope I don't drop it."
*Drops it*
"Wait. Is the hand soap dirty or is the floor clean? I can still use this soap then."

by NicoledaTaco March 9, 2017

hand dickin

When a male human warms his hands by placing them down his pants and gently caressing his testicles and penis. This is not a sexual act, it just feels fucking good.

1. Hey, I think its time to do some hand dickin.
2. This hand dickin feels good.

by q1w3r78 December 5, 2010