Basting the Turkey

(Phrase) The act of properly lubricating an elderly woman's vagina prior to engaging in sexual intercourse.

Fred: What were you doing at that old woman's house yesterday?
Peter: I was Basting the Turkey, so I could plow her.

Carol: Was that strapping young man helping you carry groceries yesterday?
Maude: Because I was so dry, that young man was basting me like a turkey, so he could plow me.

by goodtimes93 November 23, 2009

troll baiting

Troll baiting is the act of giving yourself or your argument credibility by intentionally martyring yourself by picking fights with extremist nut jobs who oppose you or your argument. The last thing a troll baiter wants is to come up against someone who is calm, intelligent, passionate and highly informed on the subject who can easily blow holes in their argument without getting vulgar or making personal attacks.

The minister was just troll baiting when he protested the sinfulness of dancing at a nightclub in a bad neighbor hood instead of the university dance department down the road because he could get more supporters by being a victim than by being wrong.

by Professor Lunacy July 6, 2014

Baltinglass

A town in forgotten Wicklow, located in the compost corner of the garden of ireland.

More commonly known as "Balto", "Imnotgoinanywherenearthatshitehole!!" or "Blessington"

The original reason for phrases like "Oooh don't go over there!","a sheep is for life, not just for Christmas" and "if ya push em up to the edge of a cliff they back up harder!"

A town built "of the people, by the people and for the entertainment of others"

The proverbial "back arse of nowhere"

-Hey we're goin to your place next weekend ok?

-Ok!

-How do i get to Blessington?

-...

-what?

-fuck off.

"Baltinglass is in the back arse of nowhere!!

by Danielicious207 April 20, 2008

basting the meat

When your girlfirend is so incredibly poor in bed that she makes the same amount of effort as a corpse - you do, in fact, end up 'basting the meat', similar to the act of stuffing a turkey. The sex is usually so poor that the male in the relationship is unable to finish, due to the cadaver like nature of his missus. He is left with painful, swollen blue balls.

Alex: "Oh mate, were you basting the meat last night?"
Henry: "MATE, she was like a corpse, minimal effort"
Alex: "Mate, did you finish?"
Henry: "Nah mate, blue balls, never have finished!"

by Choirboy69 November 20, 2006

Barting

When you suck a fart out someone's ass, swallow the gas, then burp it back up. Usually back into the face of the person who did the fart.

My wife Chelsea, that gross whore, can tell me what i had for lunch just by barting me!

by the infamous Slug October 3, 2018

Thai Batting Practice

The act of a women shooting a ping pong ball from her cunt and then guy hitting the ball with his dick

I was hitting bombs when i did a Thai batting practice with that bitch

by HEYBIGGUY March 22, 2010

Banting

The present tense of banter

Lawro - "I fucked your mum last night!"

Kris - "Oh that's not funny!"
Lawro - "Don't worry man, I was just Banting!"

by Classic Lawro July 2, 2015