Book smart but his common sense is low. He’s obsessed with jack grealishs calves and is convinced he’s built like Cristiano Ronaldo. He’s very fruity even though he says he’s straight. He wants to adopt a kid so hit him up.
by Microwaved pop tart November 17, 2021
Get the Johnmug. tryign to cut in line by yelling out the name john like you are looking for someone but really you are jsut cutting in line
by R()$$ April 24, 2004
Get the johnedmug. by Kelly Amber August 26, 2016
Get the Johnmug. John is so hot that he can attract all the females in the entire planet, but he can't keep any of them, at the end he ends up with a whore. John is so handsome that his lover gave up on him and will not even use him as a toilet.
by too good looking February 1, 2014
Get the Johnmug. John is an out of shape, balding man, who often smells of stale liquor and strippers.
His ill fitting clothes have empty pockets, are often in need of laundry.
If he asks for a small loan until next payday, say no.
Possessing undersized sex organs, he even fails at obtaining carnal knowledge at brothels, even when armed with a stack of $100 bills.
In spite of himself, he has been know to have sex, sometimes with other people, but rarely satisfies anyone including himself.
He was never a boy scout.
He often fails to understand the rules or follow them, even if he did understand.
His only real friend is an old horse, named Rocinante.
No one is sure if his parents had any children that lived.
Additionally should you meet him, he will fast become your favorite person in the world, besides every other person in the world.
He is impossible to underestimate.
At one point, he demonstrated his inability to empty piss out of a boot as he could not follow the instructions written on the heel.
He will make you wish you had more middle fingers.
If he was any dumber, someone would have to water him twice a week.
His ill fitting clothes have empty pockets, are often in need of laundry.
If he asks for a small loan until next payday, say no.
Possessing undersized sex organs, he even fails at obtaining carnal knowledge at brothels, even when armed with a stack of $100 bills.
In spite of himself, he has been know to have sex, sometimes with other people, but rarely satisfies anyone including himself.
He was never a boy scout.
He often fails to understand the rules or follow them, even if he did understand.
His only real friend is an old horse, named Rocinante.
No one is sure if his parents had any children that lived.
Additionally should you meet him, he will fast become your favorite person in the world, besides every other person in the world.
He is impossible to underestimate.
At one point, he demonstrated his inability to empty piss out of a boot as he could not follow the instructions written on the heel.
He will make you wish you had more middle fingers.
If he was any dumber, someone would have to water him twice a week.
girl1: There's a man standing over there looking creepy. Should we alert the authorities?
girl2: Oh! We really don't need to. That's just John. He's perfectly harmless, but nonetheless creepy.
girl2: Oh! We really don't need to. That's just John. He's perfectly harmless, but nonetheless creepy.
by kaylizli June 20, 2018
Get the Johnmug. John is cute
by We are well June 18, 2018
Get the Johnmug.