Toolbag McFuckface

An insult, for when "tool" doesn't quite encompass the issue.

I'd love to go, but Toolbag McFuckface here is blocking the intersection.

by ivan009 November 27, 2009

tat tool

A person who gets large, colorful tattoos simply because it it is the current fad. A tat tool has no appreciation for the art or history of tattoos.

Hey, look at this badass coy fish surrounded by roses and skulls and dragons and naked bitches I got on my chest!

You are such a tat tool.

by groundcontrol67 August 31, 2007

Tool On Deck

"Tool On Deck" is an urban phrase used when you want to let people know you have gun. The word "tool" refers to the gun and the word "deck" refers to having your gun at the ready. The phrase was originated in the south in places like Miami & New Orleans. Was made popular by rapper Lil' Wayne on the song "9mm" on David Banners album "The Greatest Story Ever Told".

What? You wanna start some shit? TOOL ON DECK!

Don't worry, if they start something I got my "tool on deck".

by Just Guy January 17, 2008

Wacking Off In My Tool Shed

Addictive behaviour conducted in demeaning and surreptitious circumstances.

(On finding a dieting woman wolfing ice cream right out of the bucket while standing in front of the freezer at 2 am): "Are you whacking off in the tool shed again?"

by Master of Procrastination April 10, 2003

blue tool

A person who walks around with their blue tooth on and has extremely loud conversations in public, seemingly enjoying sharing their business with strangers.

"It was bad enough I had to wait in line for 20 minutes, let alone having to hear some blue tool behind me yapping away!"

by toolguru November 12, 2007

Fuck Tool

A guys penis often used to fix a girl with a broken heart or down on her luck

Kiersten : Thanks Brad for fixing my sink sorry I can't pay you right now my boyfriend keeps breaking the bed and shitting on my furniture when we have sex!
Brad : Hey baby don't cry your money is no good with me anyway hey ive got just the tool to fix your problems!
Kiersten : And what might that be!
Brad : It's the most used tool in my collection!
Kiersten : Oh wow that's an amazing Fuck Tool do you think it could fix me?
Brad : Well it's never let me down yet!
Kiersten : Oh Brad! OH! OH! OH! OH! OH! OH! OH! AHH! AHH! AHH! BRAD! BRAD BRAD!
Brad : AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Jake : Hey what's going on in there!
Kiersten : Oh BRAD! it's so amazing
Brad : Ride em cowgirl!
Kiersten : Yee Haw! Cum for me baby!
Brad : AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Jake : What The Fuck! Brad I know your in there get your Fuck Tool outta my girl!

by SlopNChop September 21, 2017

Toolies

Background: Every year in Australia at the end of the final exam period thousands of high school students fly to the Gold Coast for Schoolies week celebrations.

Toolies are essentially pathetic dirty bastards who deliberately holiday on the Gold Coast during this time trying to pass themselves off as Schoolies in order to hit on and sleep with drunk teenagers. Toolies have developed into something of a sub-culture, with thousands of experienced Toolies now making the Gold Coast trip a part of their yearly routine. Toolies have an inability to get laid by anyone other than half-conscious teens. No self-respect, part pedophile, all Toolies.

Schoolie: Hey check out that 30 year old pretending to be a Schoolie, what a desperate fag.

Toolie: Hello, how are you?

Schoolie: Go back to your Toolies friends, wanker.

by Neil K December 20, 2007