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sperm swap

This is typically done with three or more people. When a guy cums after having sex, he will typically ejaculate into one person's mouth. After he is done, the person with all the semen will give some to the other person and typically make out with each other so the semen is exchanged.
Male: I'm gonna cum!
Female 1: Cum in my mouth for me! Mmmm, it tastes so good!
Female 2: I want some too! Why not do a sperm swap?

* Exchanges semen *

Female 2: You're right, it does taste good!
by SLAY3R 30 September 7, 2016
mugGet the sperm swapmug.

Sperm Burden

The result of not pulling out, being too drunk too care, or failed birth control will end up with a personal financial and emotional weight for eighteen years. Usually making it impossible to go and do anything normal adults want to do.
I can't afford to go on vacation because of my sperm burden.
by President McDevitt January 15, 2018
mugGet the Sperm Burdenmug.

sperm facial

Sperm Facial, using a man's load of hot semen to tighten your pores.
The act of massaging his semen in a circular motion all over your face.( To be peeled off later, or not?)
Sally," You skin looks so good, what do you use on it?"
Jen," OMG Thanks, Chris gave me a sperm facial last night!!"
Sally," Kat at the office could really use one of those, does it work on you back?
Jen, " Yes just have your BF shoot it anywhere and rub it in"

Nan," Your Mom looks like she is in her 30's, what is her secret?"
Mary," Sperm Facials, she's been getting them from Dad for over 25 years!"
by The only Baby Girl October 9, 2013
mugGet the sperm facialmug.

sperm slap

When you store your cum in a jar and walk around the streets putting your hand in it and then slapping every woman you see in the face, covering it with cum.
Hey, remember Giovanni?
Oh yes that 25 year old guy walking around Bologna sperm slapping women.
Noice!
by Tzotzko from Filipovtzi February 22, 2020
mugGet the sperm slapmug.

Phelps Sperm

Named for Michael Phelps, these are the fastest swimming sperm, therefore the first to fertilize he egg, but were definitely smoking something.
Chance: "I blew it when I told her I wanted to stick my thumb in her butt."

Jared: "Your dad must've had some Phelps Sperm, cause you're half-retarded.
by x-hotsauce-x December 17, 2010
mugGet the Phelps Spermmug.

sperm package

n., derogatory term for someone who thinks with his pelvis, acts in haste AND has really bad aim, resulting in idiotic and embarrassing multiple projectile-based injuries.

meme-derived from boingboing's article about violent sex between giant squid.
While attempting to rob a convenience store, Frank Loz was captured in hi-res on CC camera. His image was put on U-Toob within hours, where police and other viewers were amazed to discover that he had not been smart enough to don a ski mask. But what qualified him as a real sperm package was that he shot himself in the foot _seven times_, while trying to get his handgun out of his pants.
by Veektoastia March 26, 2008
mugGet the sperm packagemug.

Sperm turtleing

When you hold down somebody and take your mouth filled with c** and the spit it out kinda until it almost touches their face and then you suck it back up and then do it again!
That punk kept stealing my lunch money so I tackled him held him down and went sperm turtleing on him until he cried
by P'dusse July 3, 2022
mugGet the Sperm turtleingmug.

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