A device which insecure people waste money on because they are afraid their sacred, shiny cars will be stolen. Since about 99.9% of car alarms are false alarms, however, the owners eventually forget why they got the alarm in the first place, and get used to their cars crying wolf after a few occurrences.
Occasionally this will encourage angry neighbors to do whatever they can to put themselves and these useless devices out of their misery. This may include vandalizing the offending cars until they can disarm the screeching, honking, blaring whiners. Therefore, car alarms actually lead to more damage than good, and are one of the most foolish inventions in the history of mankind.
Occasionally this will encourage angry neighbors to do whatever they can to put themselves and these useless devices out of their misery. This may include vandalizing the offending cars until they can disarm the screeching, honking, blaring whiners. Therefore, car alarms actually lead to more damage than good, and are one of the most foolish inventions in the history of mankind.
For the fiftieth time in two weeks, the car alarm went off triggered by a bird who perched itself on the trunk, which caused a neighbor to get a baton and whack the offending automobile until he was able to get to the alarm and break it in two. Five minutes later, as the commercial break arrived during the action thriller movie, the car owner came out. Suddenly he realized that the alarm he had originally came to stop was no longer blaring away. He then saw the damage to his precious luxury and fainted.
by Boxcar Bob February 24, 2008
Get the car alarm mug.Falling asleep with a full beer in your hand, waking up to it spilling on you, after you shift positions in your sleep.
by Donavan Murdoc July 15, 2009
Get the Redneck Alarm clock mug.Related Words
Albar
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This act can only occur when your lover or friend sleeps with thier mouth open. The person performing the loving golden alarm clock then procedes to urinate in thier lover/friend/random pick up's from the night before mouth. Good Morning!
"Sally Sue had a huge hangover and wouldn't wake up- so I gave her a golden alarm clock.... she won't be comming back from the bars with me ever again."
by Michelle Tanner September 4, 2006
Get the Golden Alarm Clock mug.A thoughtful Arabic expression used by Islamic terrorists to kindly let nearby citizens know that they are about to spontaneously explode.
It roughly translate to: "get the fuck out the way unless you wanna turn into soup"
It roughly translate to: "get the fuck out the way unless you wanna turn into soup"
by u r luvd July 10, 2020
Get the Allahu Akbar mug.Example 1:
Jerking
Every
Second
Savagely
Imagining
Caressing
Alba
And
Licking
Beautiful
Alba
Example 2:
Joe: Hey Bob, you wanna go drinking at the bar tonight?
Bob: Nah, there's always a huge traffic jam up there every Friday. I think I'm gonna stay home and masturbate.
Joe: If I am at the liberty of asking, to whom or what will you be pleasuring yourself to this evening?
Bob: I don't know, I'm getting bored of the same old stuff.
Joe: What about Jessica Alba? She really gets my balls brewing!
Bob: Great idea! She's also been falsely regarded as the "sexiest woman alive" for quite some time now. Sexiest woman in the fucking Known Universe is more like it!
Joe: Fuck yeah! Now go fap off to that shit!
Bob: I will!
Example 3:
John: Did you see that chick that just walked by? What a babe, I would chop off my legs and arms just to have the opportunity to eat her shit.
Jay: Yeah, she's a total Jessica Alba.
Jerking
Every
Second
Savagely
Imagining
Caressing
Alba
And
Licking
Beautiful
Alba
Example 2:
Joe: Hey Bob, you wanna go drinking at the bar tonight?
Bob: Nah, there's always a huge traffic jam up there every Friday. I think I'm gonna stay home and masturbate.
Joe: If I am at the liberty of asking, to whom or what will you be pleasuring yourself to this evening?
Bob: I don't know, I'm getting bored of the same old stuff.
Joe: What about Jessica Alba? She really gets my balls brewing!
Bob: Great idea! She's also been falsely regarded as the "sexiest woman alive" for quite some time now. Sexiest woman in the fucking Known Universe is more like it!
Joe: Fuck yeah! Now go fap off to that shit!
Bob: I will!
Example 3:
John: Did you see that chick that just walked by? What a babe, I would chop off my legs and arms just to have the opportunity to eat her shit.
Jay: Yeah, she's a total Jessica Alba.
by TZG_Eleven June 14, 2011
Get the Jessica Alba mug.The act of going up to a sleeping person, bending over, and waking them up by farting near their face.
by wolfpacleader1986 August 27, 2012
Get the Fart Alarm mug.by T-Bag 69 October 24, 2011
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