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coachella jesus

The purposeful inebriation durung 3 day music weekend, that it replicates the absence of the savior of Christianity.

Note- use of pre-meditated choice to inflict cognitive absence.

And, like main stream Christianity, there will be no proof that you really left at all.
“Bro, Featherweight Tyler went SO free-spiritedly high AF last weekend, he left reality Friday and came to Monday morn. He’s , like, Coachella Jesus” he resurrected himself.
by Craig Rasputin May 26, 2018
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Jesus Face

1) Being composed with a look of serenity &/or seriousness. Level of calm that should be feared. State of mind for getting down to business.

2)The facade of Christian composure.
I have my Jesus face on and am ready to deal with those whiny little bitches at work.

Did you see those Christians totally lose it? The didn't have their Jesus face on.
by angrychick October 2, 2009
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Jesus Christ

A lame guy who is against LGBT but at the same time he has strong gay tendencies
He thinks he has no physical father

Because his mother is sadly a prostitute for bad conditions of miserable life
Jesus Christ: Hey i wanna be a messiah who is my father btw
Mary: I dont remember that day probably i am raper by a group but once i was a virgin because i serve anal and oral intercourse to my customers. Where is my birth control pills?
by Butt Hair of Gerald Witcher October 4, 2023
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Jesus envy

A nonbeliever who wishes they did believe in Christianity and Jesus Christ. A nonbeliever who appreciates and envies religious people and religious culture.
I'm an atheist, but whenever I walk by a church I get serious Jesus envy.
by Jackson Montana December 13, 2010
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Black Jesus

The most incorrect race of Jesus next to White Jesus.
Black Jesus? White Jesus? Will people ever learn that Jesus was never white or black? He was Jewish. There's a difference.
by CelticEagle February 15, 2019
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grilled jesus

Questioning Jesus and his followers. "Grilling Jesus, with cheese!"
Man, you really grilled Jesus on Christians' belief that he arose from the dead and that he is the son of god.
by grilled jesus March 25, 2009
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slippery jesus

The action of cunnilingus, where the tongue is moved in a criss-cross motion/ A movement during cunnilingus where the tongue is used to mimic the cross of Christ.
Frat Boy 1- "ah dude I scored with this hot chick last night!"

Frat Boy 2- "Sweet man! Did you giver the old slippery Jesus?"

Frat boy 1- "You know I did, bro!"
by Jeiku_Sensei July 26, 2016
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